Tuesday, October 23, 2001

I’m working on another web page but I need to put my supply chain in affect first. Three_Gallon_Toilets.com will sell contraband commodes imported from other countries. My family will become the Kennedys of the next century with an empire built on the desire to just flush once. This comes on the heels of my clandestine conversations with contractor contacts in a useless attempt to attain an illegal potty. Luckily, the last ass crack I spoke with let me in on a little secret for my current tank. It would seem that with a few tweaks (basically cutting away the plastic cup that surrounds the valve) I can increase to nearly full strength. Mounting the cheap toilet last night took three hours because I had to reconfigure the iron sewer pipe that it bolts to. The fine craftsman that cosmetically remodeled our house for the previous owners didn’t understand the way things worked. Rather than mount the collar the right way they held the bolts in place with some extra wax from the sealant ring. This would have been fine except my family actually sits on the john thus breaking down the wax’s structural integrity. More on my attempts to cheat the government out of a gallon per flush (which I pay for) tomorrow. If you have an older “Full Flush” toilet that youre looking to sell write me at howmuchforthatpottyinthewindow@stupidtom.com. 12:00:00 AM    says you