Direct from the scare the shit out of me desk Max decided to eat five or six Sudafeds this afternoon and earned himself a most expenses paid trip to the emergency room. I have to admit that they could easily be mistaken for candy but he went to some extraordinary lengths to get these things. In the span of about four minutes he dumped the entire contents of his mothers purse onto the bed for stealth reasons. This little tip was obviously taught to him by his sister who I have always suspected of some covert training. Then he determined the most dangerous item from the thousand choices and proceeded to chew through the foil that I have to use a Dremmel to break. All is well after two hours at Northwest he left with a little edge and a stern warning to Mom & Dad about locking up the drugs.
I absolutely hate the feeling of helplessness that accompanies a problem with one of the kids. I have to give Liza credit because she was calm the whole way through. When they got back from the hospital she needed a nap and I think that was the stress. EMT tom did what he was taught but getting to the hospital quick was the best solution. The good people that make syrup of ipecac might as well quit right now. Max could eat that nonsense on waffles and not even gag hard. Luckily his mother saved him from one of my fingers down his throat and I’m sure the DCFS will be happy to hear that my idea to use some of the fish tank activated charcoal didn’t occur until I started to drive.
What little hair I have left is now grey, hopefully the mini-strokes are erasing my memory.
11:43:56 PM 
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