A friend sends this ''policy'' from a firm’s internal documentation. Apart from one minor - really negligible - interpolation, only the name of the company has been changed:
Internet Use Policy
iDiotco may provide Internet access to certain of its employees to allow the employee to render more effective and efficient services to iDiotco. No employee is permitted to use iDiotco's property or Internet access to access, download from or transmit information to or relating to:
• gross, indecent or sexually-oriented materials;
• sports sites;
• sites with games or humor;
• entertainment sites;
• gambling sites;
• illegal drug-oriented sites;
• personal pages or sites of individuals; and
• politically-oriented sites or sites devoted to influencing the course of legislation or public policy.
Unless specifically authorized in advance by iDiotco, no employee is permitted to use iDiotco's property or Internet access to access, download from, or transmit information to or relating to:
[Ahem. I don't know why, but right here, I feel the need to interpolate this:
"'My son,' she answered, 'most ill-fated of all mankind, it is not Proserpine that is beguiling you, but all people are like this when they are dead. The sinews no longer hold the flesh and bones together; these perish in the fierceness of consuming fire as soon as life has left the body, and the soul flits away as though it were a dream. Odyssey, 11.
Now back to our regularly scheduled programming...]
• retail sites;
• job-search sites;
• health-care sites, (other than sites designated for iDiotco's Health-Care Plans);
• weather sites;
• news or traffic sites; and
• stock-tracking or brokerage sites (other than iDiotco's • 401K Plan).
Employees may not use iDiotco's property or Internet access to sign "guest books" at web sites, join as a member of a web site or post messages to Internet news groups, discussion groups, bulletin boards or chat rooms. These actions can generate junk E-mail which may decrease the productivity, speed and storage space of the employer's computer systems and may expose iDiotco to liability or unwanted attention. Further, employees may not use iDiotco's property or Internet access in a manner which violates any local, federal or state laws, including copyright laws.
