Choosing Words

On this anniversary of the birthday of Adolf Hitler, we recall his many contributions to the greatness of the German fatherland. If it weren't for the exaggerations over those camps, we wouldn't have all the problems we have today.

On this anniversary of the birthday of Joseph Stalin, we recall his role in bringing the Russian homeland into a role of prominence in the world. If it weren't for those trouble-making authors who sought to exaggerate gulags and mass exterminations, Russia wouldn't have all the problems she has today.

On this anniversary of the 100th birthday of Strom Thurmond, we come to honor a great man. When he ran for president, we voted for him, and we're proud of it. If everyone had followed our lead, we wouldn't have had all these problems over all these years.

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So what if they misunderstand what you meant. It was a long time ago, and things might have been better, anyway. How do we really know? This is a big, non-issue and is being blown out of proportion by a few loser liberals who don't seem to understand that they're irrelevant now and nobody has any patience for their whining. Just issue a statement and it will blow over.

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Do not let my choice of words convey to you the impression that I embrace the discarded policies of the past. Nothing is further from the truth.

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