Thursday, February 13, 2003

Wacky eBay auction du jour: $16.8K "Carrot with a vagina". I guess it's sort of like seeing Jesus in a tortilla, or the Virgen de Guadalupe in a tree. Only, it's imaginary food porn. Anyway, there's an eBay auction under way for a "Totally bizarre carrot with a vagina !!!!!!". Current high bid: $16,800 and rising. Perhaps there's something about the egregious use!!!! of exclamation!!! points!!!! that just puts bidders in the mood to feign willingness to part with very large sums of cash for stupid, ordinary objects. The seller says: "This carrot is totally bizarre dug it up last week could not believe my eyes a carrot with a vagina. It is approximately six inches long. I believe to be life size. [T]otally freak out Your friends and neighbors with this carrot. OK this auction has obviously gone completely out of control. Obviously many of the bids are apparently a joke.... Any legitimate bid that goes over $100,000 I will personally deliver the carrot see my other auctions!!!!!" Link!!!!!!! Discuss!!!!!!! (Thanks, Litza!!!!!!!!) [Boing Boing Blog] 5:14:58 AM    comment []

DIY duck-and-cover-and-tremble. ABC's Home Improvement show is featuring a DIY segment on "terrorism-proofing" your home. Nothing like a bunch of free-floating axiety and some feel-good/do-nothing measures to whip up the nation into an uncritical, writhing blob of fear-crazed yahoos. I hear that major metropolitan areas are selling out of duct tape. After Hazelton and the Kozakianwiczs looked through every room in their home, they decided the laundry room would provide the best safe haven for the family. "FEMA [Federal Emergency Management Agency] says the ideal room would be an interior room with no windows," Hazelton said. Hazelton suggests filling a bag with your essentials and leaving it inside your designated emergency room, whether it's your laundry room or your bedroom. It should include the items recommended by the federal government. In case of an emergency, Hazelton suggests sealing the door of your holding room with plastic sheeting which has been sized and pre-cut in preparation for a disaster. Then, cover the door and use duct tape to secure it on the wall surrounding your door. Don't use clear tape, electrical tape or anything else because it won't hold. Link Discuss [Boing Boing Blog] 5:08:03 AM    comment []

eBay Carrot-with-a-Vagina meme multiplies: t-shirts, posters. What we first documented yesterday with two weird eBay posts -- one advertising a "totally bizarre carrot with a vagina," the other an anatomically correct male form depicted en vegetable -- has blossomed overnight into a full-blown Web Kitsch meme. Yes, there are now outsider art paintings, and t-shirts. Next up, perhaps: a star-studded (and vitamin-A-rich) off-broadway sensation, The Carrot Vagina Monologues. Discuss [Boing Boing Blog] 5:03:03 AM    comment []

Old Europe - or old America. Nice article by Graham E. Fuller. "Think about it. France and Germany have put five centuries of wars behind them, including two devastating world wars, to form a new union with shared currency and desires to forge a broad common foreign policy. Such a step is revolutionary among ancient nation-state rivals with different cultures.But it doesn't stop there. The European Union is a remarkable experiment - the first time in history when states have been willing to give up real hunks of their own national sovereignty in order to join a new civilizational project. Turks, Bulgarians and Latvians are begging to pay the considerable admission fee to be let in.The reigning premises of the Union are that states must be truly democratic, they must protect human rights and civil liberties, and that war among its members should be an unthinkable option. These states see themselves as a gradually expanding community, acquiring ever new members and geographical spread - but only after they meet strict criteria. They aspire to form a new force in the world - and are well on the way. This is the first time we have witnessed the emergence of an "empire" built on consensus and common desire rather than power and conquest - hardly the stuff of the "Old Europe."It is America that represents the "Old World." This is not a pejorative aspersion. The United States now sees itself as the benign hegemon - or policeman - of the world, undercutting any and all efforts by potential rivals, friendly or not, to cast a shadow over overwhelming U.S. power." Good points. Europe is moving towards more consensus, collaboration, democracy, human rights and civil liberties. The United States is currently moving towards domination through force and intimidation, and the opposite of democracy, etc. [Ming the Mechanic] 4:48:25 AM    comment []

“It's the economy, stupid!”. Although completely suppressed in the U.S. media, the answer to the Iraq enigma is simple yet shocking—it is an oil currency war. The real reason for this upcoming war is this administration's goal of preventing further Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC) momentum towards the euro as an oil transaction currency standard. However, in order to pre-empt OPEC, they need to gain geo-strategic control of Iraq along with its 2nd largest proven oil reserves. This lengthy essay will discuss the macroeconomics of the “petro-dollar” and the unpublicized but real threat to U.S. economic hegemony from the euro as an alternative oil transaction currency. Via Robot Wisdom, The Real Reasons for the Upcoming War With Iraq: A Macroeconomic and Geostrategic Analysis of the Unspoken Truth Interesting take on the reasons we're so gung-ho to go into Iraq. It seems that the Caspian Sea oil fields aren't quite as big or as pure as first thought so the oil pipe through Afghanistan isn't economically viable at this time. And the Iraqi switching from dollars to the euro in November of 2000 is certainly interesting (I suppose to piss off the newly (non?) elected President). So our little excursion into Iraq may not only be for the oil, but to save our economy as we know it. Nice … [The Boston Diaries] 4:39:14 AM    comment []