How to use an outhouse.
On the first day of Boy Scout camp, scoutmaster Bob Marshall, who wore a scoutmaster's hat and a whistle around his neck, gathered the troop around the outhouse to tell us how to use it. He said, among other things, to never put toilet paper in the urinal.
On my first sit in the outhouse, I pondered this rule and came to the conclusion that the thing I am sitting on must be the urinal because there sure wasn't anything else in that room that resembled a urinal. I therefore decided to throw my toilet paper into the convenient metal receptical on the wall of the outhouse. It looked kind of like a trash can.
The next day, scoutmaster Bob gathered us around the outhouse for another lecture. He pointed to the metal receptical. "Someone stuffed toilet paper into here. Don't ever do that again, or we are going to have real problems" I must point out that he never gave clear instructions on what, exactly, to do with the toilet paper.
So, on my next sit, I had to come up with some method of disposal of my used toilet paper. I carried it out to a pile of boulders about 10 feet away from the outhouse and carefully stuffed it down there as far as I could.
The next day, scoutmaster Bob called us back up to the outhouse for a lecture. He pointed to my toilet paper wedged down into the rocks. "Who put that there?", he asked No one said a word. I didn't know much about outhouses, but I knew not to admit guilt by asking where to put the toilet paper.
So, on my next sit I decided I was just going to toss it down the crapper because it would soon become unrecognizable anyway.
8:54:07 PM 
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