6. There are thousands of writing books. Better read them all before you start. One of them has got to have the secret. (Be sure to skip all the exercises.)
11. Whatever you do, don't finish anything. Just keep starting new fragments. (Any ideas prior to your latest suck anyway.) Or endlessly torture your existing manuscripts until you drain them of any vitality they might once have had.
12. If you do finish something, immediately share it with someone who can be counted on to tear it apart, tell you you're wasting your time, and imply you're an idiot for ever imagining you could write. Believe this person — s/he wouldn't say it if it weren't true.
13. Be sure you never actually submit your work for publication. Take the decision out of the editors' hands: reject it for them.
