Wednesday, February 11, 2004

Asking the Artwork This afternoon it dawned on me to make some decisions by asking the bowls themselves what they want. I sat down with the three new bowls, poured myself a cup of decaf, relaxed, and asked. How effortless can it be? Quickly "heard" that the bowls would prefer not to be packed up into boxes any longer than necessary. OK. I can leave them where they are for a while. All I really need to do is get the shipping cartons prepared so the bowls can be delivered or shipped securely. (This is more complicated than it sounds, since the bowls have some delicate parts, but it's just a matter of working out the details now.) Then I heard that the bowls are ready for their real names. I can see how they could be tired of my calling them CM1, CM2, and CM3. I wouldn't care for this myself - CJM1, for example. I've had various other working titles, but to make a decision about the "real" names? So of course I asked. Effortless again. "Energy Transformer." "Take Heart." "Love Goes Everywhere." That last one is brand new. Straight from the bowl itself. I used to make most "marketing" decisions about bowls this way, by asking the bowls themselves. Since I was making the bowls spontaneously, just doing the best I could to follow what the bowl wanted to do next, it seemed natural. Now it seems natural again. 6:56:30 PM    comment []

I wonder if something's going on with Mom, my mother-in-law up in Illinois. She's in a nursing home for Alzheimer's patients. This morning as I was washing my face, a steady stream of memories of her ran through my mind. As I think about it now, I can see how radiantly she could smile, how tender she could look. I hear her delighted laugh. It makes me wonder. The morning my mother died, I wrote in my journal: "The core of my being is the love of God." This surprised me at the time. Later that morning I learned that I'd written this line about the time my mother died. So I think this came from a kind of spiritual visit she made to me. All her life she'd prayed for me every day. It was time for her to pass this on to me. I'm not inclined to delve into mysteries like this. I'd rather just observe. And be grateful. 11:27:49 AM    comment []

Making my life look good Suddenly it dawns on me that I've been trying to make my whole life look good. Partly it's my "art life" so it will impress galleries. But really, it's my whole life. I'm trying to "make it come out right." That's not what my life wants. My life doesn't care about looking good or coming out right. My life just wants to expand into its own fullness of being. Isn't that what your life wants too? The great thing is - that this is all contagious. Once I made an exhibit of my iron bowls and paper bowls called "Healing is Contagious." It's true. When my bowl comes out of the fullness of my being, then that energy of aliveness is embodied in the bowl itself. When I devote myself - because I want to, not because I should - to assisting the bowl to come into its own fullness of life, on its own terms, then new aliveness is added to the world. This is a kind of spiritual energy. Then this energy is available to other people who meet and engage with the bowl. I'm convinced that this kind of artmaking helps the world in two ways. It makes spiritual energy - positive creative energy - available to people who interact with the art itself. Beyond this, the process of making art this way releases this same energy out into the world as a whole. Someone on the other side of the earth breathes air that's different from before. As Bly put it in A Little Book on the Human Shadow,  some of the Shadow energy in the world has been transformed into creative energy. Paradoxically, it's only when I can give up on the idea of making my life look good, that I can do something good. 11:22:22 AM    comment []

Looking good From a post I just made on Wet Canvas: "The attitude 'this must look good' is the problem. Does your painting care about looking good? No. Your painting wants to come to life as itself. Forget about saving the painting on your terms, and get on with bringing it to life on the painting's own terms." Now to apply this to my own work.... 10:09:21 AM    comment []