Way Off Topic

Rants, Ramblings, and Reports of Jennifer Hicks
Political observation and news related to civil liberties and US foreign policy, including the war with Iraq

Way Off Topic

By Jennifer Hicks
March 28, 2003

But that's what blogs are for.

Fuck men, fuck self-pity, fuck those who get so caught up in internal turmoil that the world passes them by - or turns them into immobile creatures.

Women raise children, clean houses, and go to work. (Yes, I realize not all women fit this ... and I sure don't fit all three; I still have dog hairs covering most everything I own.) But that aside, in large part, it is women who keep the daily world running. We do not have the power (yet) to wage wars; we do not have the power (yet) to influence (en masse) the world economy. We do not have the power (yet) to be seen as contenders in the world arena. Because of myriad roles and responsibilities, we are not able (with a few, psychotic exceotions) to turn inward and follow paths that arise of the moment. (What would become of the kids? the farm animals? the home? the 'family values'?)

But, we are still the ones who make the world work.

We can procreate without you. We can get credit cars without you. We can (oh, say it's not true) expound our ideas without you and (sometimes) even get (a few) people to listen. We can love, and work, and live (all sometimes with certain difficult ramifications) without you. We have learned to survive.

We are the ones who make the 'little' liveable world work. And you know that and are fearful. For what happens if we stop?

We are the ones who make your dinners; feed your children and calm their fears: still (sometimes willingly) forfeit our dreams to create a togetherness; smooth your brow when you are distraught; and allow your concerns, fears, and worries to penetrate us when you so desire.

We are the ones who tell our chldren you are gone, dead, missing. We are the ones who remind them to love and honor you. We are the ones who keep the family, the self, you, them, the world intact.

In essence, we are the ones who create 'homeland' - and all the wonder and awe that such a term contains - on both a familial and national perspective.

For many of us, this is done willingly. For some though, the willingness evaporates very quickly as we recognize that our needs and desires should be accorded as much importance as yours. But, when this occurs, we face ostracism from the 'generic' society, feelings of guilt and self-doubt, and more days and nights of aloneness. And perhaps it's the 'aloneness' that we stuggle with most.

Aloneness give us freedom to act and speak, but it can also bring us desperate loneliness. Freedom is worth fighting for; the loneliness is hard to battle (sometimes). So do we continue on, alone, or choose to return to constant nurturer to regain physical contact? Which wins?

Actually, there is never a real choice. With individuality and femaleness comes loneliness. And still the world turns and we can choose to be observers who nurture others or participants who are seldom allowed to combine roles. One of those choices is decidedly better than the other.