1). i swear soon we'll have 'coloring of a lion' up on e-bay. believe me. eek.
2). meanwhile work has begun on 'white world (for matthew)'. it is a painting that starts as a ghost story. hypothesis: philosophy begins in ghost stories and maybe never escapes.
3). my daddy was ghosting dan beaty's house. that was before dan died. i'm hoping he was just waiting for dan and they've gone off someplace fun now.
4). i figure 1933 about the year marxism (in a 'vulgar' rendition) and the communist party eclipsed more 'american' theories of radical vision. henry george. john dewey. thorstein veblen. note: veblen doesn't even rate a footnote in mcclellan's (sp?) 'marxism after marx'.
5). i read veblen first in the public library in that town north of kingsville and west of corpus christie. that same year i go to jail for the first time for being drunk in kingsville. drinking margaritas. with my fag boss from the home for wayward children where i'm working. we get into a fight with local rednecks after he makes a pass at one though i never remember any of this. it's a terrible year for me: b-culture 'decline and fall' (evelyn waugh).
6). after that horrible year i go one afternoon down to college station with anna and carter (carl?) to see sharon who is visiting her folks. dan beaty's there and we get to drinking and i go back to nacogdoches with him. never remember my actual arrival.
7). booze is tres dangerous children. beware, beware. take care.
8). i show cleo yesterday how to hold a viola bow. remember that paula beaty (dan's first wife) taught me bow-holding. dan teaches me formal composition. paula teaches me much of painting. i am, of course, the absolute slowest of students.
9). i shall bowderize 'topless girls read veblen' and turn it to 'cleo, reading theory, a movable installation for chic hotel lobbies'. bowderization ain't necessarily bad. it's like watering your wine. sometimes wise.
10). adorno runs from the nazis to california (do, re, mi). he recounts something like: "i had thought all thinking, reflective minds to hold a concept of 'geist'. i learned this was not so."
11). 'red harvest' is dashiell hammett's model of american capitalism. takes place in 'personville', sometimes pronounced 'poisonville'. daddy is dying in centrailia, washington. we go there and one afternoon i say to beth: "damn, honey, i know where we are."
12). dos passos is my poisonville. dos passos was an american, left-wing novelist who experimented wildly. he's mostly forgotten. even by me (i can only remember reading a little on one book: 'USA' in a penguin edition. when we were living at yelldall (sp?)).
13). an unlucky number. a baker's dozen.
14). in its first incarnation 'white world' reads 'adorno/geist' in white acrylic on a green rag rug baby and i found in the street.
15). dr. ernest bienke (pronounced 'binky') is my version of dr. john brinkley. brinkley had the first border blaster (radio) whereon he touted a virility restoring operation in which bits of goat testes were transplanted into the human male's prostate gland.
16). brinkley would let you pick the goat. get yourself a frisky one.
17). baby and i figured sarah counted thusly: one, two, three (carter), seventeen... uh, seventeen... uh, seventeen....
11:13:41 AM 
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