Tuesday, July 01, 2003

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Poetry  "Hamlet Never Had It This Bad"   Hamlet you were a prince Denmark was the state Indecision was the cause Of your untimely fate Shakespeare told your story A downer of a play Mom hooking up with your daddy’s bro Would ruin anyone’s day.   But Hamlet have you ever Woken up to find Your best friend in your bed Doing Ophelia from behind? It sucks that your Uncle Went and murdered dear old Dad But trust me, Hamlet, you never had it this bad.   Job you were a farmer Trying to make ends meet But the Lord came and wiped out Your wives, your kids, your sheep. Your spirit was crushed Yet you held onto your faith You asked Him “Why?” and He said: “What I giveth, I taketh away.”   But Job have you ever Logged onto the Web And saw a JPEG of your girl Taking a cumshot to the head? I’m sorry that you lost everything you once had But take heart, Job, you never had it this bad.   Holden you were a youth Jaded by the Phonies You wandered the Big Apple Where the streets made you feel lonely You asked the cabbie where the ducks Went once the lake has froze The cabbie shrugged and said “Kid, how the hell should I know?”   Say, Holden, have you ever Seen the porno tape Of my girlfriend in the center of A fifteen-man gang-rape? It’s a shame that the modern world’s Got you feeling mad But believe me, Holden, you never had it this bad.   11:54:04 PM    comment []