Dr. Scott Wooding's Parenting Thoughts

    For years the debate has raged among parenting experts about the effects of spanking on children. For every study that has shown it to be harmful to children, there is one that finds no negative results. Nevertheless, society has progressed to the point that spanking as a consequence for improper behavior is gradually fading in popularity. However, just today the Supreme Court of Canada upheld the legality of Section 43 of the Criminal Code that allows the use of reasonable force on children. Spanking has therefore been upheld as a legal consequence for misbehavior. The question now becomes “What should parents learn from this ruling?”
    In my opinion parents should not interpret this as a license to spank their children. There are many types of consequences that are just as effective in controlling negative behavior as spanking that have no connotations of violence and these should be used whenever possible. The Canadian Supreme Court was probably more worried about the effect of eliminating Section 43 on teachers and law enforcement officers than they were about parental spanking. If they removed the ability of these professionals to use reasonable force in removing a violent student or lawbreaker from a fight, crime scene or classroom, then these people would be severely restricted in their ability to perform their duties. The other concern might have been that if you remove parents’ ability to spank, you might be giving the false message that consequences of any kind should not be used in parenting.
   This latter concern has certainly been one that parenting authorities have been worried about over the past decade. Many parents seem very confused about what to do when their children misbehave and, knowing that many experts do not believe in spanking, they do nothing about the misbehavior. This is not what these authorities are saying. Children need to know what their limits are in order to feel safe and secure. Usually it is enough for parents who observe their child doing something wrong to say “No” in a firm voice. If the child persists in the behavior, then a time out for a few minutes is usually very effective. For older children, removal of privileges, such as computer or TV time or the use of the telephone are generally adequate to teach the lesson the parents want learned. When children misbehave, something has to be done to teach them the desired behavior.
    Perhaps Canadian law needs to be re-written so a separate section covers the professionals who work with children. Parents, then, would be in a different category. In any case wise parents will discipline their children with methods other than spanking, no matter what the Supreme Court says. But discipline of some form must be used. The result will be children who have stronger self-esteem and who have better self-discipline than those who are rarely disciplined at all.