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"The frightening power of Harvey's filthy lies makes me tremble like a Frenchman. I frequently wet myself in terror and... Oops... damn." - Glenn Reynolds

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Bad Money

  Thursday, July 31, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Meanwhile, in an alternate universe, Two-Face crushed Batman & Robin into a bloody paste, blew Riddler's head off during a mood swing (hey, he came up tails), overthrew the US government, and issued new currency more suitable to his Empire's theme.

 


posted by Harvey at 9:31:59 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME




  Wednesday, July 30, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY 

 

Run for your lives! Abe's got Rabbititis!

 


posted by Harvey at 4:20:01 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Tuesday, July 29, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Time to reach for the Extra-Strength Clearasil Pre-Prom Party Pack.

 


posted by Harvey at 6:29:13 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Monday, July 28, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



...smoked two joints, and wrote this little song.

 


posted by Harvey at 8:52:43 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Sunday, July 27, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



No matter how big of a hurry you're in, remember to buy the Valentine's Day card BEFORE you start writing your heartfelt message of adoration.
posted by Harvey at 4:02:14 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Saturday, July 26, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



With the Sacagawea coin proving to be wildly unpopular, the Treasury rolls out the "new" Golden Dollar, complete with the hard-to-counterfeit "missing corner" security feature.
posted by Harvey at 10:26:17 AM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Friday, July 25, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY


Official Catholic Priest Hush Money


posted by Harvey at 9:24:37 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Thursday, July 24, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Dismissing the internet as "a buncha high-falutin', new-fangled Yankee snake oil", the folks at G's Ice House in Deer Park, Texas, decided to go with only the first half of the "wheresgeorge" approach to customer outreach.
posted by Harvey at 6:31:15 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Wednesday, July 23, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Pfizer experiments with subliminal advertising for Viagra

 


posted by Harvey at 9:53:47 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Tuesday, July 22, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY

 

Frank drops a little something in Earth First!'s tip jar.
posted by Harvey at 6:22:07 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Monday, July 21, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY


George was surprised by his after-life destination, until he remembered that, even though he'd confessed to his father about the cherry tree incident, he'd neglected to get that one cleared with the Big Guy Upstairs.


posted by Harvey at 9:14:04 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Sunday, July 20, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Being uneducated in the finer points of the art, George gets a little crazy applying the clown make-up.

 


posted by Harvey at 10:13:44 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Saturday, July 19, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY


Monica's first President.


 


posted by Harvey at 9:24:16 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Friday, July 18, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY

 

No matter how closely you follow the instructions, spam-based get-rich-quick schemes just never seem to work.


posted by Harvey at 7:38:06 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Thursday, July 17, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY

THE QUESTION:



THE ANSWER:

 

 

 

 


posted by Harvey at 9:28:47 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Wednesday, July 16, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY


Finally, some good news on the education front: 100% of Wisconsin high school seniors surveyed were able to correctly identify George Washington as the first President of the United States*

*NOTE: This survey was conducted in accordance with the requirements of Wisconsin's "No Call" list, which may have affected survey sample size.


posted by Harvey at 9:00:31 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Tuesday, July 15, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Inspired by Andrew Sullivan's example, Andrew Jackson steps prettily out of the closet.

 


posted by Harvey at 5:35:23 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Monday, July 14, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



George jots a quick note to remind himself not to always be so darn serious when chatting with foreign dignitaries.

 


posted by Harvey at 8:26:05 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Sunday, July 13, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Alexander Hamilton stars in:

Grizzly Adams: Reloaded

 


posted by Harvey at 10:30:46 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Saturday, July 12, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY

Technically, it's not "graffiti" currency, but I just like the serial number.

 

   "Okay, wait.  If you guys are really us, what number are we thinking of?"

 


posted by Harvey at 9:34:14 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Friday, July 11, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Arnold Schwarzenegger goes back in time to free the slaves in:

Terminator 4: Rise of the Republicans

 


posted by Harvey at 7:27:56 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Thursday, July 10, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Considering how Mary Todd had been acting lately, Abe figured that this was as close as he was going to get to "laid" for quite a while.
posted by Harvey at 11:07:10 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Wednesday, July 09, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



The Department of Homeland Security has revealed this key piece of evidence linking bingo-playing grandmothers to a terrorist plot targeting the US Treasury.

 


posted by Harvey at 9:51:39 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Tuesday, July 08, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Proof that Saddam is still alive, and harboring a touch of bitterness.

 


posted by Harvey at 10:36:13 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Monday, July 07, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Tipping like a drunken sailor, Kim du Toit leaves his mark at Visions.

 


posted by Harvey at 8:45:28 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Sunday, July 06, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Kids, don't be like George. Just say "no" to drugs.

 


posted by Harvey at 6:06:51 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Saturday, July 05, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY


Ryan apparently also has excellent penmanship.


 


posted by Harvey at 9:49:25 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Friday, July 04, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



You tell 'em, Andy

 


posted by Harvey at 10:54:26 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Thursday, July 03, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



Might have worked better on a $100.


posted by Harvey at 11:21:14 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Wednesday, July 02, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY



I assume that this bill's previous owner also had a dresser drawer labeled "drug storage area" containing a box of needles labeled "for injecting heroin".
posted by Harvey at 11:12:48 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME



  Tuesday, July 01, 2003


TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY: A SEA STORY

 

 

 

Way back in my Navy days, after spending 40 long, judge-sober days at sea, we finally pulled into the Philippines for 4 relaxing days in the single man's paradise of Olongapo City. Olongapo is situated right outside the Navy base there (which, sadly, closed in the early 90's), and specialized in the type of entertainment that sea-weary sailors tend to enjoy - loud rock & roll, pretty girls, and alcohol by the tanker truck.

 

My first night off base found my buddies & I bouncing from one bar to the next along Magsaysay drive, piling up empty bottles of San Miguel beer, screaming "WOOOOOOOOO!" at the bands until our throats were tattered ("another San Magoo will fix that. WAITRESS! Another round!"), and making the kind of broken-English conversation with the local working girls that most people only hear somewhere in the second half of "Full Metal Jacket"

 

Along about 2am, I staggered semi-consciously back to the ship, pausing now & again to yark up a gallon of beer, my last seven meals, and bits of my spleen & pancreas. Somehow I made it back to my berthing area to bed-spin my way into a dreamless semi-coma.

 

Four hours later, when reveille sounded, I pried my sleep-sticky eyes open, remembered where I was and most of how I got there, and realized that I felt more or less exactly like this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 






posted by Harvey at 11:05:03 PM  permalink    Crappy Broken Radio Comments (do not use) [] trackback []  HOME




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