Here's the short version, which is the best it will get on here because I don't divulge details of other people's circumstances without their knowledge or permission. Isn't that swell of me? Rather thoughtful, yes?

There's a sharp contrast between the care and attention I give to others and that which is given to me. It's been like this for a while now, and I'm getting tired of it. When do I get to make a withdrawal from the karma bank??

I seem to be this level-headed, intelligent and wise "presence" (not necessarily a "person") in a lot of people's lives to the point where they are comfortable leaning on me in their times of crisis. And they often do. I give of myself easily, and I'm a pretty sentimental, warm-blooded human. I don't begrudge people the help I give them, seek no recognition or reward beyond their thanks. And the comfort of doing the right (not always the easy) thing usually is enough to sustain me.

It also sets me up for being used like a Kleenex. And I have a very hard time dealing emotionally with the aftermath of that. Now that this has happened again, do I finally "learn my lesson" and shut the giving, caring part of myself off from the rest of society? Because the benefits of giving and caring have not accrued to me for a long, long time.

I'm beginning to wonder if they ever will, or if indeed I even have a reasonable right to expect that. All I know for certain is I'm tired of being hurt this way. 6:42:46 PM    comment []trackback []