You're motoring... what's your price for lights?
I'd been wondering what's wrong with people on the road lately. I'd noticed an uptick of vaguely threatening behaviors on the highway. Drivers tailgating me, flashing their brights, swerving around me and honking their horns, yelling and pointing. What? WHAT?

I'm not timid on the roads, but I'm not dangerously aggressive either. I'm not going fast enough for you? You want to get to the next stoplight in front of me (what I call the .02 second advantage)? Fine, go. But what's with the impolite behavior? What, you want to pick a fight or something? 'Cause you don't know me, chief. You don't want any of this pent up, Hyundai-propelled road rage. Run your ass off the road just on principle.

Well, yesterday it happened again. But it was warm enough that I had a window open, so when the kid leaned out the passenger side of the Honda that was gunning around me, I could hear what he was yelling.

"Your brake lights are ouuuuuut...."

And what do you know? Apparently they are. Only the high-mount light in my rear window works. Obviously I don't get back there to see for myself, so who knows how long they've been like that?

Probably as long as people have been trying to tell me, as best as they could at 75 miles per hour. Especially the ones who've supposedly had to swerve to avoid suddenly parking in my trunk.

Can't help but think the condition wouldn't have persisted long if I were of a different racial profile, because I keep hearing burned-out lights are the favorite pretext for arbitrary, 'targeted' cop stops. I was never stopped, and I'm certain lots of cops saw my car like this, because I'm often out in it late at night. Yet, they didn't benevolently strip my car to the frame looking for crumbs of crack because my lights weren't working. Draw your own conclusions.

So I was unwittingly dependent on a helpful motoring public, and I wasn't predisposed to correctly interpret what help they were offering.

You know how they superimpose the head of a jackass on Elmer Fudd in the cartoons? I think that just happened to me. So let me bray an apology to those of you who were only trying to call this dangerous vehicular malfunction to my attention, particularly the ones who I, ahem, "responded" to. I replaced my burned out bulbs, and my burned out evaluation of driver motives, so I'm much less of a freeway menace now. Wave hi next time you see me out there. It will make me wonder what you're really up to. 10:59:13 AM    comment []trackback []