After a very busy Monday, what did I learn from using my two mental models?
The mental models were: 1) "we are all connected" and 2) "choose value for all."
Here's what I learned...
I lived through three different but equally irritating incidents. Without practicing those mental models, I would have either responded with a pointed comments or I would have been furiously silent.
But since "we are all connected," I knew that I could not hide my negative thoughts, so I quickly changed them to gracious problem-solving thoughts.
Why gracious? Because "being connected" allowed me to see the irritating person as myself. If I had irritated someone, I would hope that he/she could see the human logic behind the action. Or if not the logic, I would hope that the mistake would be understood and forgiven. So should I be gracious for the other person, who is myself or who is connected to me?
Why problem-solving? Because if I had done this to another person, I would have wanted the other person to give me the benefit of the doubt and helped me "solve the problem" that I got myself into--rather than getting angry at me.
Remembering that "we are all connected" made it less frustrating and less stressful for me on Monday.
In addition, "choose value for all" help me find solutions I liked better. I liked myself and the other person better too.
I like this mental model because it allows for balance in all our lives. I didn't need to choose an option that might only be for the other person or only good for me. I had only to choose the option that provided the most good for ALL. This includes me, the other person involved, and everyone else who might be affected.
"Value for all" options are easier to defend. They are less troublesome than those with win-lose or lose-win results. Options that benefit all, become stronger and clearer with practice. They are definitely easier to live with in the long run.
This guideline was more helpful for the situations which were more complicated. It did take a minute more to choose the better option, but it was easier to send the email about the option and easier to defend it.
What did you learn when you tried these two mental models?
11:54:56 AM
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