got in touch with my indulgences as indulgences.. and how much it bothers me to have lost voluntary control over my right big toe some years ago. i cant quite place the loss of nerve control over the bending of my big-toe in time, but its been bothering me for over 2 years now.
getting in touch with where and how my right leg felt crippled even though its in very fine shape physically helped me to get access to the muscles and to actually stress/jiggle the toe before going on break.
i must have dropped the know-how for the nerve somewhere. doctors could not find anything wrong and regaining that control will happen. that loss is somehow just a proxy for all the places in my life where i let things happen instead of making them happen.
useful stuff.