To the lovelorn who mock Cupid as stupid and can't wait for another Valentine's Day to pass: Relief is closer than you think.
For most, there is no crueler day of the calendar year than that of
Valentine's Day. While a tiny fraction of the population can look
forward to a holiday of wine and roses, poetry and song, the vast
majority of us can anticipate a day of nausea and grimacing, trauma and
grief. A day in which minutes seem like hours, and hours like days, as
we reflect sorrowfully on yesteryear's romantic indignities, today's
loneliness, and the unknowable but certain heartbreak that will be
visited upon us repeatedly in the years to come.
The primary motive behind Valentines
is MONEY. And plenty of it! Hallmark is cleverly cashing in on
the sales of Valentines Day greeting cards. The same with people who sell
flowers, Candy and cute cuddly bears. They all do this under the guise
of something called Love.
Valentine's Day is like herpes: just when you think its gone for
good, it rears its ugly head once more. No wonder some people prefer to
call it VD.
Whether you got dumped on New Year's Eve or were
stood up in Central Park, you can still get in a last dig at that
not-so-special person on the Internet, where bitter candy hearts and
testimonials to romance lost abound.
On anti-Valentine's Day sites across the Web,
the lonely commiserate over breakups and the lack of movie-perfect
romance. Some sites suggest pranks for that heartless "ex." Others
lambaste the faux-holiday as a marketing enterprise that portrays love
as being all chocolates and roses.
"For a long time, I wasn't in a relationship and
it was a really a torturous holiday," said Megan Green, 35, a graphic
designer in New York. "You are surrounded by people who are expecting
all this stuff and you go home to nothing."
This year, instead of bon-bons, Green bought two boxes of BitterSweets, an anti-Valentine's candy from Despair Inc., a cynics' novelty retailer.
Shaped like the ubiquitous chalky "I Love You"
hearts, these candies are inscribed with slogans like "Do My Dishes"
and "Pre-Nup Okay?" Green shared some with friends at a party where
guests felled a Cupid-shaped pinata.
"Almost everybody, no matter how happy they are
in their relationship now, has been through an unhappy, dysfunctional
and toxic relationship at one point in their lives," said Despair Inc.
founder E.L. Kersten.
"I'm actually surprised at the amount of
reactionary movements that are popping up — you don't see it happening
with Christmas, Easter or Halloween," said Marc Leonard, a Black Hearts
Party producer and co-editor of the Internet site.
He cited protests by hardline Hindu groups in
India — where heart-shaped greeting cards were set ablaze last year —
who say the Christian saint's day encroaches upon their culture.
"Valentine's Day is intruding on people's
personal lives...(Love) should not be mandated by the marketing
division of Hallmark and the idea that everyone in the world should
celebrate that specialness at the same time strikes us as false,"
Leonard said.
For most, there is no crueler day of the calendar year than that of
Valentine's Day. While a tiny fraction of the population can look
forward to a holiday of wine and roses, poetry and song, the vast
majority of us can anticipate a day of nausea and grimacing, trauma and
grief. A day in which minutes seem like hours, and hours like days, as
we reflect sorrowfully on yesteryear's romantic indignities, today's
loneliness, and the unknowable but certain heartbreak that will be
visited upon us repeatedly in the years to come.
