Matt Foley: Motivational Speaker
Matt Foley: Motivational Speaker
Dad.....Phil Hartman
Son #1.....Christian Slater
Daughter.....Melanie Hutsell
Son #2.....David Spade
Matt Foley.....Chris Farley
...
Dad: His name is Matt Foley, and he's a motivational speaker. Now, he's been downstairs in the den eating No-Doze for about four hours! [ peeks his head into the next room ] Hey, Matt? Come on up, we're ready for you!
Matt Foley: [ enters living room bouncing back and forth ] Thanks, Dad! I'll take it from here! Well, well, well. Now, as your father told you, my name is Matt Foley, and I am a motivational speaker! Before I begin, I want to tell you a little about myself, so you'll know where I'm coming from. First off, I am 35 years old.. I am thrice divorced.. and I live in a van down by the river! [ approaches Son #2 ] We'll start with you young man! Now, let me begin with an obvious question: Who threw the egg?
Son #2: I don't know. But I can tell you what you had for lunch today - a chili dog. [ the teenagers laugh ] No, really, I don't know.
Matt Foley: [ mimicking ] I.. don't.. know! Well, that and a nickel will get you a hot cup of jack squat! Young lady, you want to throw in your two cents?
SNL at http://snltranscripts.jt.org/93/93emattfoley.phtml
9:01:57 PM 
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