Sunday, April 20, 2003

Computer Haiku Computer Haiku In Japan, it is said, the impersonal and sometimes unhelpful Microsoft error messages have been replaced with Japanese haiku poetry. Maybe in the next upgrade to our Windows... Your file was so big. It might be very useful. But now it is gone. The website you seek Cannot be located, but Countless more exist. Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent and reboot. Order shall return. Aborted effort. Close all that you have worked on. You ask far too much. Windows NT crashed. I am the Blue Screen of Death. No-one hears your screams. Yesterday it worked. Today it is not working. Windows is like that. Stay the patient course. Of little worth is your ire. The network is down. A crash reduces Your expensive computer To a simple stone. Three things are certain: Death, taxes and lost data. Guess which has occurred. You step in the stream, But the water has moved on. This page is not here. Out of memory. We wish to hold the whole sky, But we never will. Having been erased, The document you're seeking Must now be retyped. I ate your Web page. Forgive me; it was tasty And tart on my tongue. First snow then silence This thousand dollar screen dies So beautifully. The Tao that is seen Is not the true Tao, until You bring fresh toner. With searching comes loss and the presence of absence: "My Novel" not found. See how in Haiku All error messages are Somehow more peaceful Richard Blewett [richardb@DEVELOP.COM], Ian Griffiths [igriffiths@DEVELOP.COM] and Shepherd, George [shepherdg@PLURAL.COM] Internal Mailing List Wed 2/28/2001 comment [] Google It! 11:37:50 AM     Marketing Marketing....  (a bit off color!) People often ask what is meant by Marketing. Perhaps the following analogies will help clear it up: You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." That's Direct Marketing. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, "He's fantastic in bed." That's Advertising. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say," Hi, I'm fantastic in bed." that's Telemarketing. You're at a party and see a handsome man. You get up and straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," And reach up to straighten his tie brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed." That's Public Relations. You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed." That's Brand Recognition. You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You talk her into going home with your friend. That's a Sales Rep. Your friend can't satisfy her so he calls you. That's Technical Service. You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be gorgeous women in all the houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof of one situated in the middle and shout at the top of your voice, "I'm fantastic in bed!". That's Spam. You hear about women like this but never meet one. That's False Advertising. Created by unknown Contributed by Asaf Shelly Thu 2/13/2003 6:50 AM comment [] Google It! 11:29:50 AM     Evolving Evolving...  What a great shot! This site contains a set of .NET, COM and Win32 tools that Chris Sells has built and contributed to the world. But I was struck by his picture of eveolution.  ! comment [] Google It! 11:25:27 AM     http://www.sellsbrothers.com/fun/msiview/#myInterview Interviewing @ Microsoft:  An interesting and DETAILED description of a tough process. I had two days of interviews at Microsoft in the middle of March, 2003. The first day was with the MSDN content group. They're the folks responsible for all of the technical articles at http://msdn.microsoft.com and the ones at Microsoft with the job most closely related to what I already do. It's their job to tell developers how Microsoft technologies really work through articles, talks, samples, online chats and whatever other means they think will be effective. From Chris Sells comment [] Google It! 11:16:16 AM

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