(total time today working on actual bowls: 0)
Did errands instead. After that, cleaned up the studio, organized the paints.
It's funny, but yesterday afternoon I had a feeling that maybe I was on the run. I didn't come away from the studio feeling as strong, courageous, and satisfied as I'd been feeling. And I decided that I'd do errands in the morning instead of going first to the studio. In retrospect, I was indeed on the run.
I'm eager to complete these two bowls - have lots of ideas I want to do next. At the same time, I'm reluctant to complete any artwork because then it's Judgment Time. "What do you think? Is it any good?"
It's definitely possible to complete work and not enter Judgment Time. The more I'm just making the bowl however it wants to be made, the less I care what anyone else thinks. I know the bowl is supposed to be that way, so that's the way it is. It just...is itself.
Still, some part of me must be trying to protect me from those childhood experiences of "no, that's not good enough." Now that I write that phrase, I wonder why it has any power. "Not good enough - so what? So you make more."
I do know it's better to make a lot of bad bowls, I mean bad, really b-a-d bowls - stinking bowls, ugly bowls, monster bowls, horrible bowls - than not to make any bowls at all. So I might as well get on with it. I can't do errands every morning. The energy I spend on more creative excuses, I might as well put into the studio.
9:48:24 PM 
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