The Desktop Fishbowl
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Friday, 30 August 2002

I'm definately seeing XXX, and Bourne Identity, but pass on the others. I don't think i can really stomach a saving-the-world-from-mass-destruction moofie, or a Mel Gibson trying to be a farmer moofie. —Brett Morgan Signs sucked. It was a typical M Knight Shamayalan movie—all the characters were unbelievable and totally impossible to identify with, and the pacing was way off. This worked in Sixth Sense, where the two main characters were both supposed to be other-worldly, but both movies since have fallen flat because of it. He tried to offset it with a bit of David Lynch–style small-town weirdness, but he didn't manage to pull it off. There were a few funny moments, but not enough to carry the movie. It was totally impossible to suspend disbelief. I'm not talking about the the whole “Crop Circles” rubbish, where you have to believe that aliens capable of space-travel are so bad at drawing maps that they have to flatten fields to remember where they parked their cars. You figure hey, that's the premise of the movie, I can live with that. It's the stupid things. Like blurry video that looked like one of those newsreel bigfoot movies being automatically accepted as a real alien by the news. Or the fact that aliens can fly across the boundless reaches of space, but can't get through a locked wooden door. Or the total lack of any reaction from the powers that be. Or (I've stuck this in a comment because it's a spoiler for the end of the film. You'll have to view source to see it. Search for "MORONIC MOVIE" to find the spot) Anyway, Signs was rubbish. You don't want to see it. 6:39:58 PM