Wednesday, June 11, 2003

Even though it really shouldn't matter, that writing should simply be an exercise, I have to admit that I do get some satisfaction out of publishing to the Web. With my subscription expired, my will to write has diminished. I held little Douglas Fuchs today, 6 weeks, and there's something so peaceful about holding a little being so close to the source, life's mycenium, that it makes me think that we need to arm soldiers with babies, make politicians and generals make war decisions from within the confines of nurseries, just to keep everything in focus, keep us close to life, not relentlessly barreling towards death. One thing that we never read about, and may never fully understand, so vast is the underaccounted experience, is what it's like for families of warriors to have those soldiers never return. I read a little summary of the major events in ancient warfare, one of which was the slaughter of tens of thousands Roman troops by Hannibal, or the Parthian's slaughter of nearly 20,000 Roman troops, including the commanders, who entered the Parthian tent to parley. And I can't help wondering what it must have been like for the families to know, or maybe never know, about the fate of sons and fathers. I wonder what the percentage loss of life would have been in those situations, given the population of the world at the time. If we could even conceive of the number today. It also makes me think of the importance of flanking and the line, not only militaristically, but in martial arts, the importance of controlling your line, not breaking discipline, not falling into feints and traps, maintaining posture and control. 2:47:43 PM