Falling in love with someone that isn't in love with you and admitting it to that person is incredibly hard (I know he cares about me but I also know he isn't in love with me). Telling yourself that you aren't in-love only makes it hurt more inside, I think because you aren't being honest with yourself or at least it is for me. Telling that special someone in your life that you don't want them completely out of your life sounds wishy washy but for me, its true, I don't want him to go away. I'd really miss talking to him and honestly I'd miss kissing him. He turns me on more than any other man every has and I've learned what turns me on. I haven't shared much about my personal life these past 5-6 months because I told him - I wouldn't put anything about him on this blog...this was/is definetly more than just a buddy vibe..this was chemistry and still is very much so..I wasn't looking for him at all, he sorta of just appeared in my life one day and I almost didn't go out with him in the first place but talked myself into it..we had chemistry right from the start. I felt him pulling away and I knew in my heart of hearts, that this relationship was changing..but I didn't want to let go and still don't. I'm not looking and have no desire to look for anyone else in my life but I also don't think he is holding me back anymore because I now have told him the truth about my feelings and started being honest with myself. Love is hard. I wish he was in the right place in his life for a committed relationship. I know that everything happens for a reason, there was a reason he came into my life and there is a reason he will continue to be in my life no matter what. Love evolves..friendships evolve...just a matter of listening to your heart and being honest with yourself and your friends.
(please no negative comments about this)
11:15:29 PM 
Dating
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