Sunday, June 08, 2003

A SEX TOUR THROUGH COSTA RICA. WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW. Part II by Connoisseur - April 2003  .............................................................................................................. Continued from posting 06/07/03 MONDAY, APRIL 28, 2003 El K left very early for a flight home, so I meet elbowGrease for breakfast and sign in as El K and eat for nothing. It was good. And free. We take a walk on 2nd Avenue, where I pick up a bunch of non-Pfeizer viagra. I purchased them there on my last trip, and it worked just as well, but with less of the side effects. I can be a poster boy for side effects with the real stuff, so I'm happy. The price was $8.97 for two, 50mg pills. Elbow and I then split up. I head for Joselyn's, which was starting to be an unattainable quest for me. I discovered Joselyn's a few trips back one afternoon with my buddy B. It cost about $1.50 to get in, but that included a beverage. There were a couple of pretty young girls the first time, so I figured I would go back at night. But I could never find the place at night. I next found it with Wacko, Goal and X last trip. Again a few pretty, young girls. Ah ha! They're only open days! This time, I enter and try to get a soda. Only beer, they say. Water, I ask for. No water either. "Wait here, we will get some." And a kid runs out of the place. Fifteen minutes later, I begged just for a glass of ice, but no go. My soda was on the way. I decide to liven up the proceedings. I approach two young girls. One was pretty enough, but the other one just gave off the vibe that she was on earth for one thing and one thing only. I choke a little, and my Spanish gets worse. The prettier one takes a beer, but my new love doesn't drink either. The three of us sit and joke about our thirst until the drinks finally show up. I ask how much is the charge here and am told $16.66. FOR TWO, I ask. No for just one. Two are $33.33. Vamanos, I say. They're shocked, but game. This was a half hour to remember. The prettier one tried to keep up, but her friend was an animal. I think her hips are still moving. They were all business, so they certainly earned the $7.69 tip I gave each of them. I stumble to my room and rest for a couple of hours until I meet up with elbowGrease for dinner. We go to the El Pueblo Mall (think Las Olas Riverfront or Citywalk except REAL) and have a good dinner. We sat at the table Goal dubbed 7A in his honor. We cab back to the Del Rey and I hit the Tute table while elbow roots me on. He is starting to act a little depressed, due to his trip home the next day. It happens to all of us, I explain. The up side is that he's coming back. It cheers him up, but only a little. By this time, I have given up hope of finding Denise. I was already planning to go rescue the girl from the afternoon, and just keep her around all the time until I go home. How much could it cost? So I am gambling and gathering my strength for tomorrow, when I am grabbed from behind. "Mi Amore!" I hear, and get a good look at a big smile. Just when I gave up and ditched all my plans, there she is. I say, "elbow, I would like you to meet Denise." He smiles and says, "I'm not needed here, see you." We make breakfast plans for the morning and off he goes. Denise and her friend Patricia join me at the Tute table. I give Patricia some chips (sort of a consolation prize) and we talk while I lose money. "Did you go home? I called and called." No "Did you get a visa extension?" No "I talked to your sister. She gave me your number here, but they never said you were home." I moved out. Those girls were bad. "Where were you the last two days? I was looking. There's even a reward." I hurt my knee. Enough small talk. I give Patricia what's left of my chips (VERY few) and off we go. First we go back (for me, at least) to El Pueblo. It's now about 11 pm, and the bars are hopping. We go to a couple of discos, and she gets some food. We then head back to the hotel. We were chatting, and having a great time. Last trip, Denise was new at this sort of thing. She wasn't a virgin, but I may have been her first professional experience. It was awesome. You may have noticed I was a bit, er, obsessed. Flash forward two months. This time, she seemed to learn the word, "no". Not often, but often enough. She started asking questions: "When did you get here?" Saturday. "Did you miss me?" More than you could imagine. "Why didn't you email me?" Because you didn't give me your email address. "Oh." "Why are we in this sh1thole of a hotel room?" Well, we were at the Radisson, but I couldn't find you. "Did you see any other girls while you were here?" Uh, one. Well, I said, I couldn't find you. My turn: "What about you, this is your job. You're with guys all the time." That's different. Besides, I don't get much work here. Well, we get the mission accomplished and fall asleep. TUESDAY, APRIL 29, 2003 I wake up on time to meet elbow for breakfast. I explain to Denise that I will be back later. She's OK with that, she loves to sleep. We meet for breakfast. Elbow congratulates me on a mission accomplished. He had a good time in San Jose, so we part ways as new friends. I return to the hotel and wake Denise up. We shower, dress and head to the San Pedro Mall. The San Pedro Mall is your average, run-of-the mill mall. Stores, food court, movie theater, arcade -- just like home, except it's all in Spanish, except the words "Food Court." Go figure. It was her first time there, but it didn't take her long to add it all up. Girl, mall and guy with money = Free Clothes! She gets a couple of shirts, two skirts, some shoes and some other stuff. I cut her off at about $100. She complains. I explain that I have money, I just don't want to spend any more of it right now. She's not happy, but agrees. We have a mall lunch and go see a movie. It starred Dustin Hoffman and some CIA stuff. I like seeing movies over there. They're in English, with Spanish subtitles, so it's like Spanish Flash Cards for me. As we're leaving, she tries to hit me up for sneakers and jewelry. I hold firm at "no". Back at the hotel room, she shows the proper appreciation for her gifts. I was able to talk her out of a couple of the "nos", but this was a different girl than I met in February. Harder, more jaded. We rest up a little, then have a sushi dinner and look for Patricia, probably to show her the new clothes. They go off to chat, while I gamble some. It was fun telling the girls in the Del Rey sorry, no. Why?, they would ask. Because my girlfriend will kill me, I answer. She comes back and bitc*es at me about the sneakers some more. I have none of it, and ask, "where do you want to go now?" She says, nowhere, I say OK. She says, let's go back to the room, I'm tired. I say OK. At the room, she jumps in bed and pulls the covers up. Calling her bluff, I tell her that I am going back to the casino and will be back later. I go downstairs and win about $30. When I come back upstairs, she basically attacks me and an hour later, leaves me drained and asleep next to her. I guess when I left, she got worried. Or something. I have no clue. She's female. And she thinks in Spanish. WEDNESDAY, APRIL 30, 2003 We wake up, and we're both surly. Me, because all my wonderful dreams didn't come true, and I was going home today. And her, because it was way too early, based on her regular sleep patterns. We act civil to each other while we eat breakfast, shower and pack. She says, well, I'm outta here. I give her about $200. She counts it (last time, she never even looked at the money I gave her), thanks me, kisses me on the cheek, and says good-bye, when are you coming back? I tell her I don't know, but I will write. I take her downstairs and put her in a cab. Off she went. I go to the Del Rey, and lose another $53, head back to the hotel, check out and get a cab to the airport. How did I feel at this time? Bad question. Numb. Sad. Foolish. Happy. Don't ask how, that's how I felt. At least the flight home was on time. AA didn't lose my bags, and my friend was there to pick me up as the other half of my birthday present. VARIOUS NOTES All converstions listed above (with the chicas) were primarily in Spanish. I have practiced a lot, but again, it is NOT necessary to speak the language here to have a good time. Likewise, all prices were in Colonnes. I just did the conversions for you. I liked my cab driver to the airport. He's a good kid, and spoke very good English. If I do a short trip, I may just put him on retainer. It would cost more, but the convienence would be worth it. The airport exit tax is now US$26. It is a slicker system, and they take Visa. Not Master Card or Amex. I was laughing too hard to even ask about Discover. Now, the question I have been dancing around: What am I going to do about Denise? Well, probably nothing. I will write her in a couple of weeks, and she probably won't write back. The next time I go, if I see her, I will probably not spend the time with her I did this trip. I'm pretty sure that most of our, er, relationship the first time was in my head. Regardless, she was different this trip -- not the girl I knew previously. I was VERY serious about Denise #1. Just my bad luck that she didn't go home when I was in the Dominican Republic. Or maybe luck had nothing to do with it. After all, she didn't show up until I abandoned my initial plans this trip. I guess the search for Miss Right continues. Until next time, adios. .............................................................................................................. THE CONNOISSEUR REPORT - World Sex Guide. 10:48:59 PM    comment []

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