For one year between undergraduate and graduate school, I taught seventh grade history and English in a Catholic school. That was a real eye-opener for me in two ways. First, I'm not Catholic, there were only two Caholic families in my home town, and the first nun I ever met was my boss, Sister Mary Annunciata. I went from heathen Protestant to playing guitar at Mass. The second thing was how hard it was to prepare lessons.
Education runs deep in my family. Later I served two terms on the local school board. My wife now has 32 years in as a public school teacher. The last 24 as a third grade teacher in a very small rural school district. We've been discussing a change in families over those years. Especially in the last couple.
It's long been said that parents no longer stick up for the school. When I was a kid (and this was the same for many I've talked with), if I got in trouble at school, then I was in trouble at home. Over the last 10 years or so, it seems that parents have switched that into some sort of overprotection of their kids or a "chip on the shoulder" mentality. That is, if the kid gets in trouble at school, they try to make trouble for the school.
Now, parents don't seem to want their kids to work. Third grade one of those quantum jump years where things go to a new level. The students must now learn to do homework on a regular basis and assume some responsibility for their work. For 24 years, my wife has met with parents at the beginning of the year and explained these facts of life. Just some simple instructions: make sure you child has a place to study, homework should not take more than 15-30 minutes at this age, set aside a time every night (how about just after dinner and before TV time), and so on.
She seems to have two different types of parents this year, neither of whom are helping their kids grow up. The first cuts across demographics. They have little or no control over their children. When the mother of a 7-year-old comes to the teacher and says she can't control her kid, the teacher asks what she expects when the kid is 16. The other type seems to focus on a certain demographic group. In this group there is no family. Some of her students this year are with mom as she is now living with the third different "dad" this year, in the third house, with siblings fathered by two-four different men. There is no discipline in these houses even for the so-called adults.
And politicians looking for votes and business men who think schools are like factories totally ignore these realities. With absolutely no support at home, these kids will struggle for a long time. We only hope that some of the stuff they experience will stick and help them if and when they get some maturity on their own.
Now things are different if you are in a community that is not diverse economically. If all parents are competitive, upper-middle-class, then most of the kids (except for a few rebels, who grow up later) will reflect that (but I hear that even in those areas there are parents who are overprotective and suffocating). But if you are in an economically and socially diverse area, things are different--and tough.
6:21:36 AM 
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