If I were a comedian, I would only agree to do shows for people who had at least a .4% alcohol reading, but only people without anger issues. Good natured, even generally good natured people, who are even mildly drunk find everything hilarious. I am continually amazed by how funny I am when I work the bar section of the restaurant. People, especially late at night, almost fall off their chairs sometimes when I ask silly questions like, "Would you like some water?" I'll admit, that's pretty hilarious material - hard to resist in any state of mind. But it doesn't warrant crazy guffaws.
That , of course, is balanced by mean drunks, whom I avoid. Like the type of people who tried to polish Joe's bald head a few weeks ago. Their type of humor is at the expense of the server, whom they see as their personal piss boy, and this is not a gender neutral phenomenon - women, when they are treated to worst humans offer are treated as whores befitting a cliche' of middle ages public houses, pinched and prodded and ogled. A customer, and former waiter, Saturday night remarked, and I wholeheartedly agree, that people should be forced to work 6 months waiting tables, just so they know what it's like and treat wait staff with some civility. He also commented, and I hadn't really thought about this before, that going out to dinner on a first date is a great way to get to the core of someone's humanity - just by observing how they interact with the wait staff. A corollary to that would be how, in most cases, the wait staff interact with your date. Although it's dawned on me that it really doesn't matter that I know the difference between pinot noir and merlot, or even a red wine and a white wine, let alone the subtle differences in flavor produced using white rather than black pepper or that I cook or read the Wine Spectator or eat out at fine dining establishments or actually check my tables to make sure they have water and fresh ashtrays and all those other details - people tip, by and large, on factors completely outside of my control, first and foremost, my gender, the mood they are in, and what they're predetermined formula is. More and more, I try to maintain my standards of service, and have fun with the tables who are fun, without regard to how much money I think I might make. It just makes the evening more enjoyable, and the money is so unpredicable that the best I can do is make sure I enjoy myself as best I can.
12:52:19 AM 
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