Wednesday, December 24, 2003

Wilderness Time I'm reading Living on Wilderness Time, by Melissa Walker, for the third time this year. What she means by Wilderness Time is the same thing I mean by "postpatriarchal time." I used to call it "thick time" because it feels rich and thick like dark chocolate, and has the same effect as a "chocolate high." (Yet it's nonfattening.) It's the feeling of having all the time in the world - and at the same time, savoring the present moment. There is no sense of rush. I used to say that any sense of not having enough time was a sure sign of living in patriarchy. I was right about that. But I stopped telling myself that at some point, and accepted the sense of crowded "thin time" as what I had to experience in order to earn a living. In thick time, postpatriarchal time, wilderness time - life is a gift, not something to be earned.   9:52:08 AM    comment []

Dream Interpretation: What would bring me the most joy today? This is really a dream fragment, one that needs little or no interpretation. Dream: I'm standing in a brightly lit room. It may be a bathroom. I think there's some glitter around, as if it's a glamourous place. I think "What would bring me the most joy to do today?" Then I catch myself starting to argue with myself right away, as if this isn't a valid question for me to ask. I'm amused that I did this, and pleased that I caught it. I decide to go ahead with my question. Interpretation: I take this at face value. At some deeper level of consciousness, I'm deciding (or have decided) to go for joy. Part of me tries to argue that this is wrong or not good enough, but I decide not to listen to that. Last night at bedtime I did some journaling in a book I just bought, The Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting Playbook, by Lynn Grabhorn. I'm not sure yet that I recommend the book, since I've just started it. Last night I wondered if plunging into problems and beliefs was a good idea. It might just get my mind into a negative groove. But it does seem likely that the book stimulated a very positive dream. I do recommend for sure, another book by Lynn Grabhorn, Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting. I wrote about it earlier in this journal. 9:03:56 AM    comment []