DATING TIPS
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“FOR GUYS, GETTING LAID IS A CHORE.
FOR WOMEN, GETTING LAID IS A CHOICE.” - Ross Jeffries
Ross Jeffries knows ugly guys can get laid. By his own admission, he’s an ugly guy, and he gets laid. All the time. By many women. And he says he can teach you how to bag babes, too. The image at top right was the cover of the first self-published book Ross wrote about the girl-snatching secrets of Neuro-Linguistic Programming or NLP.
The Boob Beat column of the September '95 issue introduced Jeffries to SCORE magazine readers: "The sexual revolution may be dead but there are some rebels left. Ross believes in a technique called NLP. Simply stated (which ain't easy), NLP involves the use of language and guided imagery to induce a state of sexual arousal in a woman. You then link that arousal to yourself. NLP is not theatrical hypnosis ('I am Julio Iglesias. You are my biggest fan!') nor should it be associated with B-movies that conjure up scenes of Bela Lugosi sexually controlling females through hypnotic will. 'He who hesitates, masturbates,' declares Jeffries. His classroom seminars and appearances ontelevision talk shows have hit a raw nerve in many who wouldn't mind if Jeffries and others like him fell through the earth's crust."
Speed Seduction: The Amazing Seduction Secrets Of A Skinny, Ugly, 6 Ft. Geek From Culver City, California, That Could Get You All The Hot, Sexy Women You Could Ever Want, Despite Your Looks Or Age is a how-to by a successful hottie-hunter whose methods are taught in seven languages in 14 countries.
“Speed Seduction is a way for men to attract and seduce women without dating,” the middle-aged Jeffries says. The concept has obvious appeal.
No dating?
No expensive meals?
No listening to her life story?
Five minutes to sex?
Indeed, Jeffries’ website, speed-seduction.com, is a tool box for anyone from the lonely guy who's had enough of self-service to the booty-bagger who wants to ramp up. And it reads like a Horatio Alger story of a geek who pulled himself up by his bootstraps and became a lady killer:
My Love Life Used To Be A TOTAL DISASTER!
The Sexual Equivalent Of The Sahara Desert!
I Got Laid A Grand Total Of Twice!
The Phone Call From God That Changed My Life!
Ugly, Skinny, Geeky Me Could Write My Own Ticket And Attract All The Hot Women I Wanted!
“The best part is you’re no longer getting into a relationship just so you can get laid regularly,” Jeffries said. “I’m not suggesting you stop being yourself, but you have to transform yourself and get rid of behavioral habits that cause you to fail before you start.
“Women want sex more than money or power. By focusing on this aspect, you avoid falling into the trap of trying to meet her material expectations. You’re simply going to give her the kind of sexual satisfaction she wants.”
Sounds better than Saturday night at home with a six-pack, your mouse and the gallon tub of Vaseline. But is Jeffries nothing more than a snake-oil salesman who will do anything to sell his audio tapes and seminars?
I did what any skeptic would do: a test drive of Speed Seduction techniques. Then I gave my results to Jeffries for a critique of my successes and failures. He pulled no punches. Because in love and war, only the strong survive.
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Test Case One:
The Supermarket Siren
Having come and gone more than once without scoring the smoking chicas who shop at my local market, I wondered if I could control my lust enough to put Ross’s methods to work.
I zeroed in on an ash-blonde braless beauty in skin-tight hip-huggers and Cuban heels. She thrust her superstructure forward as she navigated the aisles. I smiled at her. To my surprise, she smiled back and slowed her pace as I followed.
We approached the fruit stand. I watched her handle the cantaloupes as I searched for an opening line. All I could think of was the round, firm globes of her megaboobsand ass, and my thoughts were totally scrambled as she licked her glossy lips. I sidled up next to her, picked up a juicy bunch of grapes and plopped them onto the scale.
“Excuse me,” I said, “But I hope you won't be offended if I pay you a compliment.”
JEFFRIES: “Hang on a minute! Where do I advocate something THAT weak? I do say to say, ‘Excuse me,’ but that part about ‘not being offended’ is carrying politeness into begging. I wonder where you got that I advocate THAT. I do NOT!”
She picked up a plantain that would make Shaq’s schlong look like a toothpick.
“See this?” she said. “You know where to put it, right?" The three-sixty she did gave me a panoramic view of her butt. Then she vaporized.
Experiment over.
JEFFRIES: “Come on. She was that big of a cunt? I've never had a woman say any such thing to me. EVER. But then again, I don't beg for the right to give her a compliment.”
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Test Case Two:
Mating Dance.
I met Kat at a South Beach party in 8th latinas street. She was a quirky, blonde interpretive dancer who put on artsy, semi-erotic shows around town. I decided to push her buttons by commenting on how impressed I was by the image of woman as goddess that she was putting out in her performances. Floating a Speed Seduction-type phrase, I asked if she agreed that “sometimes you feel a connection you really can’t explain. But when you feel it, you have to let it get inside you.”
“I like adventure, especially extreme kinds of scenes,” she said as I admired her high-cheekbones, full mouth and pert bosom.
“Show me,” I challenged.
Her body language promised more. “Call me anytime,” she whispered into my left ear as her knees rubbed mine.
I called her the next day. She suggested I pick her up the following evening to, as she put it suggestively, “get together.” She asked me to take her to dinner and wondered if I knew an intimate, romantic café with a slightly offbeat, even kinky atmosphere? Sure I did.
Jeffries’ warning against falling into date-like situations came back to me, but like an overenthusiastic rookie, I let myself get suckered by the idea that I was halfway around the bases already.
JEFFRIES: “Okay, so you didn’t follow what I taught. You got some interest and then turned right around and put yourself through the dating frame, and she naturally viewed you as another sucker instead of someone different as you FIRST came off to be.
“If you don't follow what I say, it isn't a fair test. If I tell you to drive 100 MPH but you are stuck in neutral, is that my fault? No, it’s yours. YOU DIDN'T FOLLOW MY DIRECTIONS!”
During dinner, I tried to seal the deal. The smooth jazz, red walls, Oysters Rockefeller and flickering candlelight made it all seem like a fait accompli. I made my move.
“Look,” I said. “I’m a lot of person, and that overwhelms some people.”
“So am I,” she said, looking directly into my eyes.
“We might want to test each other,” I offered.
“We might,” she countered.
I paid the bill. As she got into my car, she flashed some thigh. Her dragon tattoo riveted my attention. The coquettish tone of her voice had me feeling like a winner.
“I’m curious about your tattoo,” I said.
“You want to know all the answers right now, don’t you?”
“I’m ready to take whatever you’re ready to share with me," I replied, feeling clever but realizing that quip might just be my deal-breaking mistake.
JEFFRIES: “No, the mistake was letting her call the shots. By following her suggestion that you go out somewhere, you let her control you. The right answer was, “I really don't have time for dating, but if you are up for hanging out and exploring how good you can feel, well…”
“Even better would have been to fuck her the first night you met her. That ‘call me’ stuff put you through HER hoop-jumping routine, like every other guy. I would have said, ‘Nah, phone numbers are for nerds. I'd rather go on the ride than hold on to the ticket stub. How about you?’
A block from her apartment, Kat turned to me and said, “Living with a roommate is kind of annoying at times. And I’ve got some paperwork I’ve got to catch up on.” The peck on the cheek I got as I delivered her to her door had “strikeout” written all over it.
JEFFRIES: “Well, DUH!”
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Test Case Three:
Mona The Mall Queen.
I picked myself up and hit the mall on a Saturday night. I came across Mona in a runners’ specialty store as she perused the shoes in the men’s display. She was a petite hottie with a butt and belly that said, “I like it hard,” and a nicely crafted pair of C-cups. Speed Seduction material? Time to find out.
“I think the men’s rack is on the other side,” I opened.
“I know. But I like the look of these,” she replied as she scanned my package. “You look like a runner. Sprints?”
“Actually, I’ve done a few marathons.” A good start.
“I like short, hard runs,” she said. She was running her hands across a shoe like it was penile tissue.
“Slow and steady wins the race, some say,” I said.
She laughed. “I’m Mona,” she said, extending her hand. “Maybe you can show me how to pace myself.” She moved towards the back of the store. We were alone. “Picking up some new gear?” she said. She plucked a sleeveless running top and shorts off the shelf. “Maybe you can try these on for me.” She motioned to the changing room.
JEFFRIES: “Once again, she is directing YOU. YOU are doing what SHE suggests. NO NO NO! Take charge. Make HER model for you.”
I ducked inside, pulled off my clothes and got into the shirt and shorts. Bulging with excitement, I waited for her to come in. A few minutes went by. I opened the changing room door and saw Mona striding out of the store. The sales clerk had a grin on his face.
“That bitch comes in here all the time,” he said. “She always picks something out and never buys anything.”
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Test Case Four:
Poetry in Motion.
I was having drinks on the deck of a friend’s waterfront house when Jessi, a tall Italian poet with legs for days, showed up. We talked about poetry and exchanged numbers and email addresses. Then she started complaining about her current boyfriend.
“He always says he’s too busy to call me,” she said. “I’m really fed up. I need a man who really knows how to love. A man who knows that the power of love is everything.”
I seized my chance. “And if you met such a man, would you be able to handle him?” I said. This was classic Jeffries.
“I would give him everything,” she said.
We walked back into the house to get some ice, and Jessi said, “Oh, damn. I forgot to wear panties today.”
“Thank you for sharing that with me,” I said. “But I have a feeling there’s more.”
She leaned back against a wall and guided my hand straight up her thigh to her love nest. The kiss that followed singed my body hair. She gasped and pushed me away.
“I want you to read my work,” she said. “But now you must go.” I didn’t argue.
I got home to find one of the most erotic emails I’ve ever received. My cell-phone rang, and, sure enough, it was Jessi.
“Did you get my poems?” she asked.
“Jessi, I sense you’re a woman of real depth who wants someone to explore and understand her fully,” I said. I could see her responding.
JEFFRIES: “Nice use of how she views herself. You are using what SHE told you as a guide for what to say. Notice the difference: You use HER words to feed back to her, but YOU control the actions and YOU give the suggestions, not her. Feed back what a woman says but don’t DO what a woman suggests or tells you. Get the difference?
“I need a place to write for a few days,” she said. “I cannot focus where I am now. Do you know what I mean?” Focus. With her Italian accent, it sounded like fuck us. I wondered whether she was using Jeffries’ method of using words such as “focus” and “below me” (“Blow me”) in just the right situations to send subliminal messages.
“You can come here whenever you want,” I said. “And feel free to let the inspiration flow.”
Jessi met me the next evening at a bookstore. We browsed the racks together. Later, she showed up at my pad in a slinky dress that didn’t stay on and stiletto heels that did. Some women know where all a guy’s erogenous zones are. Jessi was one of those women.
But then she told me she wanted to move in. I felt like a sledgehammer had hit me square in the gut.
JEFFRIES: “Hey, you got the pussy. Don’t complain. But this one sounds suspiciously like a Klingon. With Klingons, fire the torpedoes, raise the shields and go to Warp Five."
Like he said, at least I got laid. And in Speed Seduction, that’s the bottom line.
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More sex tips at Scoreland.com- by The SCORE Group, creators of SCORE magazineand Voluptuousmagazine (women with large natural breasts).
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