SEX TIP #15
Dear Sex tip counselor,
My girlfriend is a little weird. I'm not unhappy with her, but we've been arguing about this for a while now, and I think it's really starting to affect our relationship, particularly our sex life. A few weeks ago, in bed, Marcy was on top of me, in the mount position. Everything was going great, and I put my hands on her ass while she was bouncing on my dick, like I always do.
Then she asked me to slap her ass. I smiled and just kinda patted it, you know? I wasn't going to really hit her. But, she asked me to do it again, harder. I didn't want to, so I just kinda patted her bottom again, a tiny bit harder, but really not even a slap. There wasn¹t even a "slap" noise when I did it.
To make a long story short, we finished like we always do, but afterwards she kept asking me why I wouldn¹t hit her harder. Johnny, I¹m not into the S&M thing, and the last thing I want to do is put a palm print on my barely-18-years-old girlfriend, considering her parents don¹t even know she¹s seeing me. I don¹t think they¹re gonna be too keen on the fact that I¹m 37, divorced, with two kids. I don't want to lose Marcy, but I don't want to hit her, either.
Tonight might have been where she drew the line in the sand, because tonight we didn't finish because she got upset, challenged my manhood, and made me drive her home. When she got out, she told me I should only call her, "When I grew some balls." Johnny, what can I do, this is serious.-Unwilling, via the internet
Dear Unwilling,
In the words of one of my favorite bands, The Offspring: She's got issues. Check out the song, and you'll probably find there's a lot in there that applies to your semi-current girlfriend.
You've got two choices, the way The Master sees it. One, you do give her what she wants, just once, and see if she's really serious about you putting the palms to her. I've got a feeling that if you do give her the whack on the rump she's begging for, that she might back off . As far as a mark, unless you're the World's Strongest Man or something, a palm print on the butt shouldn't last more than a couple of  minutes if you do it once.Of course, this does put you in an unenviable position. You don't like the idea of hitting her, and if she does still want you to continue after the first good whack, you're back at square one.
The second course of action, is to sit her down and ask her why she wants to be hit. Here's where your relationship with this girl is really going to hit a serious note. Does she think she deserves it for something? Does she feel she needs to be hit for a reason? Has she suffered abuse in the past? Dude, this is also unenviable, because you might be facing a girl who has all sorts of baggage and she needs to unload it somehow. Not that that's a bad thing, but it might really take some time to work through.
You seem to care about Marcy a lot. Sit her down, explain your concerns, and see if she opens up to you. If it's all about a thrill, maybe you'll have to compromise on occasion, if it's worth keeping the relationship.
Let me know what happens, Unwilling, and good luck.
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11:45:39 PM 
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