Tough Stuff to Face
CFS and Fibro are chronic syndromes that are excerbated by everyday living. As a result one is constantly trying to judge how much CFS/FMS damage is actually self-inflicted. "Self-inflicted" is certainly an inflamatory phrase. We've all had doctors, friends, etc. tell us that we're either making up our illness - it doesn't exist, or our illness is a manifestation (somatization) of some sort of mental or character defect. It's either "All in Your Head" or "Caused by What's in Your Head." As a result, phrases like "self-inflicted" can put one on the defensive.
However, at least in my case, self-inflicted is a valid term. Or, how about just to make me feel better, partially self-inflicted. So here's my short list of stuff that I either should do something about or stuff that I've already decided to live with even knowing that it's a CFS contributor.
The Tough Stuff List:
Anxiety.
As I've gotten older, I seem to have developed some issues with anxiety. And it's the real thing - panic attacks etc. There is a school of thought that believes anxiety can excerbate CFS. The constant flood of neurotransmitters and adrenalin that anxiety engenders may cause the body to react in a CFS way. I think there is some merit to this theory. Now - there are three ways I can deal with anxiety:
- Anti-anxiety drugs.
To be honest, these guys scare me a tad. But there are some mild ones out there that I might consider.
- Gutsier counseling.
If I had the guts to really rip back the covers in therapy, maybe we could deal with some of the anxiety issues. But I am such a coward.
- Drop Out.
O.K. - this isn't really an option. And I don't want to either. However, once in a great while, it does have a certain appeal.
My Pets
I am really allergic to Jasper, my cat and mildly allergic to Clem, my dog. It's Dr. Bateman's theory that my CFS is at least partially attributable to living with Jasper for sixteen years. The accumulated asthma and allergic reactions have paved the way for CFS. Note: I developed my cat allergy about five years into the "Jasper Period."
Obviously, I should get rid of Jasper - I cannot tell you how many times various doctors and well meaning friends have told me that I have to give up Jasper. Well - I can't just "give up" someone who I've had for 18 years and I am completely responsible for. So, since I won't abandon my little buddy, here's how I attempt to mitigate the Jasper allergens:
- I get allergy shots that include cat dander goodies.
- My pharmaceutical regimen includes Zyrtec, Advair, and Flonase.
- I wash the sheets every week to get rid of accumulated Jasper hair.
- I wash (or should wash) Jasper every week with anti-allergen shampoo.
- Jasper will also start going to the groomer once every five weeks. This makes a huge difference - the groomer does a much better job than I ever could.
- I wear a dust mask when I empty the litterbox.
Activity Levels
I have a "Type A" personality - I go go go - or actually I used to go go go. Because of CFS I now usually only have enough omph for just one "go". This is tough, but I will say that I am sort of dealing with it. I've started lowering my expectations.
The tough part of lowering expectations is not that I still want to do more. It is occasionally a problem but the lack of energy takes care of that one. No, for me, the real problem is that I lower my expectations too far. I am becoming lazy and don't have the courage to push forward. This is the real tough one.
4:08:54 PM 
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