Hope is Beautiful
Reading all these women's blogs like Glove fox's great entry at Blog sisters made me start writing out my own sad past life story. I am not sure if I really want everyone in town to read it, though. It's way in the past, no use in dragging it out.
I have told the story countless times to therapists and certain friends. In one blog I was going to argue the case against government welfare, based on my own experience. But I don't have the time or the patience right now. So don't start, please. Just enjoy the links and see if it expands your mind.
Positive, that's what I want to be. Thinking forward-I have so much to be thankful for now. I realize much more-stuff that I didn't appreciate when I was younger. Like all the good things my mother did for me. We are all biased, sometimes we have clouds blurring our visions of reality. I have accomplished a lot since those days. We all can become better than our past selves. When we concentrate too much on hurtful events, it blurrs everything else.
We can choose to wallow in self-pity and despair and be miserable, or we can choose to be a pleasant person to live with. That, is the big lesson I have learned just observing my mother throught the years. The greatest thing she has taught me, never to become what she once was. By that I mean-I can't really tell if she has mellowed out or not. Being away from her negativity is healing. It helps us both.
She said today that she no longer attends Multiple Sclerosis Society events because she "wanted to live a normal life". Wow. That is really encouraging. I hope she does not stop. I had a dream that she was wasting away...something that I think might be happening, but what do I know. She lives in Florida. I cry when I think about her losing muscle.
Still, the Multiple Sclerosis Society gives me something to feel good about. They are still working to find a cure. That will help my mother. We should reach out to one another and offer hope. Offer encouragement. That is the best part of the human spirit.
I need to go to bed, get up and pack to take Racheal to her dad's in Wilkesboro. Then drive all the way to Charlotte to see my sweet, wonderful husband. He's working a new job contract there, and staying at his mom's during the week. This weekend I am driving down instead of him driving up. Four hours of driving tomorrow. At least Bonsai will keep me company the whole way.
10:37:22 PM 
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