Wednesday, March 31, 2004

Samson, Delilah & Dubya With skyrocketing gasoline prices across the USA becoming a presidential campaign issue, CNN's Lou Dobbs Tonight broadcasted a soundbite of candidate Bush in 2000, touting his ability to, as he put it, "jawbone OPEC" based on his experience in the oil industry. But now that he's the occupant of the Oval Office, it's proving more difficult than Bush had anticipated to slay the OPEC Philistines with the jawbone of an ass. 10:22:32 PM

God is My Co-Pilot Today the defense rested in the manslaughter trial of former NBA star Jayson Williams.  Their case concluded shortly after Williams declined to take the witness stand in his own defense.  According to the Associated Press: "I am innocent, I put my trust in God and I have great confidence in this jury," Williams told Superior Court Judge Edward M. Coleman without the jury present. Williams was probably unaware that the last person to publicly state "I put my trust in God" was co-pilot Gamil al-Batouti, heard on the cockpit voice recorder of the ill-fated EgyptAir flight 767, which crashed in the Atlantic off Nantucket Island on October 31st, 1999, killing all aboard. 10:18:26 PM

Trumped Donald Trump intends to apply for a trademark on the phrase "You're fired" so that he can put it on merchandise for sale in conjunction with his hit show "The Apprentice." Apprentices fired by Trump are applying for a trademark to sell merchandise featuring Trump's photo with the caption "Would you buy a used hair salon from this man?" 7:47:15 PM