licentious radio

Thursday, May 15, 2003
[9:36:32 PM]

Here's the real thing about using Homeland Security to track down Democrats: the cops in Oklahoma knew not to touch it, the FBI knew not to touch it; the Justice department knew not to touch it -- but Homeland Security touched it.

Homeland Security is monstrously out of control, and has now let itself be used for domestic political purposes.

Tom Ridge should be made to walk the plank. If this precedent is allowed to stand, it's obvious how much trouble we're really in.

[7:27:57 PM]
Jessica Lynch is breaking into the news again. I presume US media will ignore the story now.

Let's see. She had gunshot wounds, then she didn't, then she did, now she doesn't again, unless she does. Whether US doctors can find wounds that aren't there or not, the Iraqi doctors say there were no puncture wounds when she arrived there, and none when she left.

Interestingly, they say now she can't remember what happened, although we were all told she kept shooting Iraqi soldiers until she ran out of ammunition, even though she had been shot at least once, maybe twice.

At this point she's been shot at least three times, and not shot at least three times. If she can't remember what happened, it's no wonder.

[2:43:40 PM]
I want my WMD!

I remember Junior telling us that Saddam was an imminent threat to this country because of his huge stockpiles of WMD.

I remember the UN Arms Inspectors wanted a few more weeks to track down the WMD, but Junior said it was so *urgent* to eliminate the WMD that we couldn't wait another day, even to save thousands of lives.

I remember Junior and Stooge Powell saying we would invade Iraq under UN authority to eliminate the WMD. Breach.

Saddam was a breach. They said it over and over. Breach! Breach!

Where's the breach???

A UN resolution said "No WMD". Junior said Saddam is a breach. Junior said we must invade. Now. Where's the breach???

[2:34:09 PM]
Congratulations, Sheryl Nelson of Seattle, Washington!

Sheryl wins the licentious radio "Which Branch of Homeland Security Will Help Find the AWOL Texas Democrats" contest. The rules were: one entry per person, and only the first-to-be-revealed branch would count.

Sheryl correctly guessed: "Air and Marine Interdiction and Coordination Center" of Riverside, California.

Thanks to everyone who entered the contest.

For those of you keen to improve your chances next time, we asked Sheryl how she got the right answer....

According to Sheryl, "It was mostly luck, though I figured it wouldn't be the Coast Guard, or Immigration. The Texas governor was using the same resources that we count on to fight international terrorism, so I knew they have contacts with every branch of Homeland Security. But then I thought of all the Democratic politicians who die in small plane crashes, and realized it would be easy for Homeland Security to track the where-abouts of any Democrat's private plane."

"Of course, it really was just luck that I won. I mean, the Texas top-cop-jock who contacted Homeland Security might have just looked in the newspaper. Then where would I be? It was widely published that the Democrats were in Ardmore, Oklahoma," Sheryl pointed out.

[1:02:51 PM]
We told you. Republicans called on Homeland Security to track down Democrats involved in a political brawl:

"One federal agency that became involved early on was the Air and Marine Interdiction and Coordination Center, based in Riverside, Calif. -- which now falls under the auspices of the Homeland Security Department.

"The agency received a call to locate a specific Piper turboprop aircraft. It was determined that the plane belonged to former House Speaker Pete Laney, D-Hale Center." --Fort Worth Star-Telegram [dfw.com].

This is an unacceptable political perversion of resources that should be used to keep us safe from international terrorism.

[9:10:32 AM]
Now that we know Bush & Company were lying through their teeth about WMD in Iraq, here's a good question: How many US soldiers died because they were wearing chemical protection suits -- that limit flexibility and vision. Good news is that very few Americans died. Bad news is that some who died would have lived if it weren't for Bush's Big Lie on WMD.