Thursday, March 27, 2003

Wobblies specifically won't take people who have the power to hire and fire as members, which I think is a mistake. This is a different world of workers, and creating a just world can't be accomplished by general strikes anymore. I had an important revelation about breathing last night. That it is as important to be present in breathing even when completely relaxed. That being in touch with that breathing when completely relaxed can help me stay in that place even when I'm stressed, instead of struggling to breath in stressful situations, not really remembering what breathing relaxed feels like since I only focus on it when I feel the need to do so. Elaine, one of our first clients, and I were talking earlier this week about her sister's death. A couple hours before she died, she asked Elaine if everything was packed. If the kids had their shoes on. If her husband was ready. Elaine told her yes, that everything was fine, that she could go, and showed her a suitcase, and told her all the things that were in it. The discussion started when we talked about how our society is so rational, even with our "rational" monotheism, that we don't have the icons, the focus, the ritual to help us get through life's transitions, including death. I joked with Bill about how having a Frank Oz puppet character as my focus, a name for my voice of power, what I once called my elves, was so helpful. He commented on the fact that it's ironic that what was a fantasy inspired naming, my elves, has been replaced by a "real" fantasy based icon. A friend of his, a Buddhist, who meditates with his different idols spread out in front of him, calls himself a recovering monotheist. And I think there is something about recognizing and honoring the spirit within each living thing that we lose when Godhead becomes something so removed, so concentrated, as one single entity, distinct from all the world. Having its own membrane, rather than being the linkage by which all membranes, all beings know one another's deity. 12:39:13 PM

I've been thinking lately of the Wobblies - and I don't know enough about them to really know if this is part of their agenda - but when I think even of how much more closely connected I am to some white collar Joe across the world, doing Web development work even, than I am to the tiny percentage of folks in the world, less tiny maybe in the U.S. than some non-Western European nations, but still tiny, who hold the world's assets, it makes me wonder if we shouldn't be working towards a more general strike, including everybody, refusing to do work that does harm, refusing to do work that we do not have some ownership stake in, refusing to participate in elections that involve private money, refusing to have our educational system churn out an uninformed electorate. Imagine if collectively the world said we're done. Done with the crazy scripts we've lived with. Done with the toil. That what we're going to focus on is not the organized violence that our Western world has used so effectively to subjugate the globe, but organized peace, working towards the greater good. I was thinking of Eponymous, and Habanero, as I drove past Grand and the grand old office building that Habanero was in, and Eponymous is in now, and I couldn't help thinking that what if our best and brightest simply refused to do work for cheesy capitalism. Would capitalism adjust markets to different measures? I don't see why not. What if our Keynesian economics actually valued education more than tools of war. Would the business model shift toward that? Boeing churning out self actualized, well read, community change agents, and exporting that instead of warplanes? Could take years, but I think that would happen. I was talking to Denise at the ACLU today about how I wish I could fast forward a few generations to where we had a more liberal liberated society, but how if we weren't focused on the work of change right now, however frustrating, there wouldn't be a better world to fast forward to. We have to stay focused on what I know to be true and right and for the betterment of all humanity, which I, completely selfishly, want to keep around to hold my genetic code, so it can see the wonders of the universe continue to unfold. Bill brought up a book title last week. I think he said "That which is real cannot be threatened." And as I begin to embrace that more and more, that sentiment of feeling real, more subtely and subconciously right now - it's not something I'm fully aware of, more just from seeing empiric evidence in my own reactions to the world, and the world's reaction towards me - it's pretty amazing how not threatened I feel, to the point of not feeling bitterness that would have consumed me in previous situations. I watch it pass into me and through me, and then I almost immediately stand alone, watching the path that pain and fear have followed. 1:22:50 AM