Tuesday, January 07, 2003

You Be Beautiful Since Christina Aguilera seems hell bent on totally remaking her image, I think she should go for broke and become a sista from da hood.  Forget being skank trash with more piercings than braincells.  She should give in to her blackness (I know I have).  In an effort to help her out, I've decided to rewrite the lyrics to her latest hit in order to reach out to a demographic that may not realize how truly universal Miss Aguilera is.  So here is "Beautiful" my way: "Tight" Don' u peek at me Every day be so's wonderful An' sudden-like, it be a bitch ta' breathe Now an' den, I git insecure From all da fame, I is so's ashamed I be tight no matta' whut they say Words caint brin' me waaay down I be dime in every single way Damn straight, words caint brin' me waaay down So's duzn't yo' ass brin' me waaay down today T'all yo' homies, u r delirious So's consumed in all yo' doom Tryin' rock t' fill da emptiness Da piece be gone an' da damn puzzle undone Dat's da way it be, biatch Yo' ass be tight no matta' whut they say Words won't brin' yo' ass waaay down Yo' ass be dime in every single way Damn straight, words won't brin' yo' ass waaay down Don' u yo' ass brin' me waaay down today... No matta' whut we do (down low, no matta' whut we do) No matta' whut they say (down low, no matta' whut they say) We be da damn song inside da damn tune Full o' fly mistakes An' everywhere we go (down low, everywhere we go) Da sun will 24/7 shine (down low, sun will 24/7 shine) An' tomorrow we might wake on da otha' side All da otha' times We be tight no matta' whut they say Damn straight, words won't brin' us waaay down We be dime no matta' whut they say Damn straight, words caint brin' us waaay down Don' u yo' ass brin' me waaay down today Don' u yo' ass brin' me waaay down today Don' u yo' ass brin' me waaay down today   On a side note:  my sources tell me that Christina spends hours doing this. 7:51:15 PM     |

© Copyright 2005 Alex L. Mauldin.