Yes, I invented the Internet..., uh, when I was just a young pup...
"there are guys out there saying they have, like, the patent rights to video streaming, or hyperlinking, or whatever...but that's chicken feed 'cause I was talking to my attorneys about my idea that I had for the WHOLE INTERNET. I had the idea when I was about eight years old...uh, yes, it was....uh... when my friends were all doing the cup and string thing. Yes, that's right. Except they were using a one-to-one protocol. You know: one cup connects directly with one string, and it connects to, uh, another cup. But, and uh, let's see... I thought of the idea of making lots of strings so that the cups all connected to one another. And I even sketched it out in my coloring book. Yeah, that's what I did. Lots of colors and pictures of cups with strings. My mom was so proud that she, uh, framed it and put it on the wall. So I showed the book, er, picture, to one of my attorneys and he said I had a good case and I should sue everyone who was using the Internet, sue them all for using it without paying me for my invention. Uh, and so I hereby demand that everyone out there send me money. Right away, er, or I'll be having my lawyers contact you. Yes, that's right. And they'll sue. So send me my money right now! It's my Internet! You can use it, but I want my money. Now!
Yes, I invented the Internet..., uh, when I was just a young pup...
