I'm scheduled for a colonoscopy tomorrow at 1:00 PM. For all you who are experienced in the ways of colonoscopies, you know that as I type here at 8:40 PM, I'm in the middle of a very good time.
Not.
The day before a colonscopy, one can only consume clear liquids. So I spent the day consuming tons of water and weak tea - and one bottle of apple juice. Overall, it pretty much sucked - the only calories I could get my grubby mitts on were the pure sugar calories in the apple juice and that got old quickly. But as annoying as all of that was, the real fun began at 7:00 PM.
At 7:00 PM, as instructed, I chugged down a bottle of Fleet's Phospho-soda - simply the foulest tasting stuff ever on the face of the planet. Omigod it's bad. And once you get it swallowed, you have to keep it swallowed. Which is very difficult. One's body just want to repel that stuff right back out.
The Phospho-soda and the required follow-on 32 ounces of fluid then start percolating through your gut. It's like a bad cartoon. I figure I have about another half hour to go and then I'm going to be very busy. This is my second colonscopy, so I have a pretty good idea of how I'm going to be spending my night.
Trust me. After all of this, the actual colonoscopy is a breeze!
8:55:39 PM 
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