Wednesday, December 03, 2003

Customer Support Hell I just bought a new desktop computer today.  Thinking I can have it up and running in no time, I eagerly plugged everything in and waited for it to come to life.  It did.  Sort of.  Eventually I got a message saying that it had detected a "configuration error" and that I needed to call Customer Care and let them know I had a "Code Purple" on my hands. Great. So I did just that.  I called the 1-800 number (which isn't free if you're calling from Germany, by the way) and soon I had a woman on the line who sounded like she was talking to me from somewhere in India and who wasn't too sure about her English.  But I tried my best to be patient, and after the introductory information, the conversation went something like this. Customer Care Woman:  When did you buy this computer? Me:  Today.  About an hour ago. Customer Care Woman:  When did you first notice a problem? Me:  Today.  About ten minutes ago when I first tried turning the computer on.  It says I have a Code Purple. Customer Care Woman:  For how long have you been having this problem? Me:  Ten minutes.  No, make that eleven. Customer Care Woman:  Do you have any important files on this computer? Me:  No.  I haven't been able to use the computer at all.  I was trying to start it for the first time. Customer Care Woman:  Did you recently install any new software? Me:  I just bought this computer.  I was starting it for the first time! Customer Care Woman:  Have you contacted us before about this problem? Me:  Not in the last twelve minutes... And so on.  Eventually she walked me through the system recovery process (which takes twenty minutes) and told me to call back when that was done.  I tried that.  Still the same error message.  I really don't want to talk to that woman again.  I feel so alone, so desperate, with no one who can help me with my Code Purple. Update:  I took Chris' advice in the comments and just took the computer back to the store I bought it from and exchanged it for another.  The new one seems to be working ok, but I can't hook it up to the internet just yet because I can't find the goofy instructions you have to follow to set-up German DSL.  That's tops on my list for tomorrow. And I might have figured out why I'm having such a tough time today (my whole day has been crap -- not just the computer headaches).  This was the time of year that my chimney sweep paid a visit.  Now I don't have a chimney, but apparently it is German law that one has to come out and inspect your heating system -- chimney or otherwise.  So as I was checking out of school early to make sure I was here for my sweeper appointment, the secretary told me to make sure I shook his hand.  I had no clue what she meant by that, so with a look on her face like I was a complete imbecile, she explained that shaking a chimney sweep's hand is good luck. Oh.  Silly f-ing me. I tried to shake the dude's hand, too, when he was leaving, but he had one hand full with a tool box and the other with what looked like medieval torture devices.  So I just said my goodbyes and left it at that.  Ah, but the price I've had to pay today has been steep, my friends.  Never again will I leave a German chimney sweep's hand unshaken.  In fact, I'll probably break that sucker right off, I'll be pumping so hard. 6:08:41 PM     |

© Copyright 2005 Alex L. Mauldin.