Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Someone With Issues Other than voting for Bush in November, I can't think of a bigger waste of your time than this. Doesn't he know she is smothered in suck?  At some point that guy needs to take a hard look in the mirror and realize he's just wasting other peoples' precious oxygen.  Him and Avril both. Sheesh.  You might as well stalk Ann Coulter.  Though if anyone's lame enough to do it, I hope they at least bring the girl a sandwich.  Poor, conservative nutjob is starving to death. Related link: Antistalking website:  it's not a word -- but by golly, it's a website. 10:08:14 PM     |

I'm A Dickmann Now Sorry I haven't posted anything in a few days.  I've had issues with my phone/internet connection and haven't been able to get online. Haven't been idle, though.  Last night I decided to fix some of the local cuisine.  Turned out pretty well.  Had Käsewürstchen (sausage with cheese inside), saurkraut, homemade french fries, and toasted rolls.  Washed it down with my favorite Belgian beer.  Life was good last night. But oh, life got so much better now that I've had a Dickmann. Let me explain. When buying my groceries for last night's little indulgence, I saw by the checkout counter a stack of boxes labled "Super Dickmann's."  Not one to pass up on a opportunity like this, I snatched a box and added it to my pile.  I had no clue what I was buying, but the pictures on the box looked sorta like chocolate something or other, so how bad could it be? Couple of hours later, I had my dinner, and then pried open the Super Dickmann's.  I  expected a bunch of little chocolate candies.  Nope.  Just four big Dicks. Of course there had been the big "4" on the box, which should have been a big hint, but I didn't know what "4" was in German. Stupidity aside, I do possess a brave soul, so I decided to just grab one of the Dickmenn and take a bite.  Lo and behold, the big brown Dickmann was full of a white, creamy substance.  Not pure cream.  A little thicker than that.  Maybe marshmellowy, if I can make up a word. The Dickmann didn't taste bad, though.  I didn't even consider spitting it out. A little searching online today made me realize just how big Dickmann's are.  For instance, you can find recipes for including the things in your desserts, like tortes, or even muffins.  You can also use them instead of pies for smashing into someone's face. Best yet, go to the official Super Dickmann's website , where if you click on "Dicke Partytipps," you'll find out about "dick, dicker, and superdicker."  Not sure what dicker is, but you definitely get very colorful costumes you can print out to decorate your Dickmenn with.  I don't know, though.  I think I like my Dickmenn natural.  And if you click on "Dicke Events" and then click on "Dicke TV-Spots," you'll be entertained for hours.  I know I was. Back to my other three Dickmenn.  You know what?  I might just shove all three into my mouth at once.  It is my birthday after all.  Have to live a little. 6:31:07 PM     |

© Copyright 2005 Alex L. Mauldin.