Wednesday, February 11, 2004

Wesbound First Wesley Clark started calling himself Wes to be folksy.  Then he put on a cardigan sweater, which only made him look like Mr. Rogers.  Then he tried to cash in on his Southern heritage.  It was all in vain, and now Clark has withdrawn from the Democratic presidential race. Q: Now that Clark is out, what is Howard Dean's campaign strategy? A: Hope that Al Sharpton and Dennis Kucinich stay in the race to make him look good. 6:08:20 PM

Immaculate Conception In Iraq, the Pentagon is in the midst of its largest troop rotation since World War II.  Members of the military will finally have a chance to see their families, including in some cases children born in their absence. The real problem, of course, is with the children conceived in their absence. 11:16:18 AM

The Gay Divorcée Even if the Massachusetts legislature passes a state constitutional amendment restricting marriage to heterosexuals, it won't take effect until 2006. Meanwhile, under the recent ruling by the state's Supreme Judicial Court, same-sex couples can get married beginning this May. Thus, even if the state's constitutional amendment passes, gay couples will still be able to get married, but only until 2006. At that point, their only recourse will be to have their marriage annulled by a priest who has just been defrocked for molesting altar boys during the two year duration of the couple' s marriage. 11:09:38 AM