Life's Complications I recently met a woman who lives in Toronto but who very likely is going to move to Whitehorse to be with the man she loves. She is in the Yukon this week with her two teenaged children, in part to give them an idea of what the place is like and hopefully to make them feel more comfortable about the move.
Last night, her 16 year old Danielle went with Iris to visit one of Iris' friends, and afterwards, the three of us went out for nachos. Danielle is probably one of the most mature 16 year olds I've ever met. She's intelligent, expresses herself incredibly well, and seems like a well-adjusted young woman who knows exactly where she's heading. She also has absolutely no desire to move to Whitehorse.
Last night in the restaurant, she talked and Iris and I mostly listened. She understands well her mom's need to be with this man. She, after all, knows what it's like to miss someone so much as to be in physical pain, because there is a man in her life too who she says she's madly in love with. She says she can't possibly think about leaving him to move to Whitehorse. In her words, "I think I would become mentally unstable."
Her mother Michelle says it's not possible to compare these two loves. You see, according to Michelle, the love she (the mom) has for Pierre is strong and permanent.....the love Danielle apparently has for this young boy is fleeting and could be gone in a few weeks. Why do we parents tend to default to the idea that intensity of feeling is age-dependent?
I feel for Danielle. I feel for Michelle. I hope they can find a solution that they can both live with.
6:51:25 AM
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