101 Dumbest Moments
I wet my pants...
In a perfect world, a list like this would not exist. In a perfect world, businesses would be run with the utmost integrity and competence. But ours is, alas, an imperfect world, and if we must live in one where Enron, Geraldo Rivera, and Cottonelle Fresh Rollwipes exist, the least we can do is catalog the absurdities. [Business 2.0]
Some of the Gems!
1. Houston, We Have a Problem, Part 1: Enron states billions of dollars in extra revenue through aggressive accounting and complicated off-the-books partnerships managed by its own executives, all the while ignoring warnings from its employees and enriching its top executives at the expense of its investors and workforce. And it assumes none of this will ever come to light.
16. "No one will deny that Sony is a world-class hardware company, and no one would deny that Microsoft is a world-class software company. Nintendo aspires to be neither one of those things." -- Peter Main, a Nintendo marketing executive, to the San Francisco Chronicle
26. Houston, We Have a Problem, Part 5: In November, just as the scope of the financial improprieties at Enron becomes apparent, the James A. Baker III Institute gives out the Enron Prize, for distinguished public service. Its recipient: Alan Greenspan.
40. The Newspaper Association of America names Kmart its "Retailer of the Year" on Jan. 21, 2002, one day before the company files for bankruptcy protection under Chapter 11.
59. In October, Global Crossing forgives two-thirds of a $15 million loan it made to newly appointed CEO John Legere when he worked for the company's Asian subsidiary. He also receives a $3.5 million signing bonus, despite the fact that he is already employed by Global Crossing. Of course, the $13.5 million is pocket change for Global Crossing founder and chairman Gary Winnick, who -- despite the fact that his firm has never earned a penny of profit -- has already sold $734 million worth of stock in the soon-to-be-bankrupt company.
63. Bottling the Stench of Death and Calling It Perfume: Philip Morris also attempts to counter antismoking measures in the Czech Republic by commissioning an economic analysis of the "indirect positive effects" of early deaths -- savings on health care, pensions, welfare, and housing for the elderly. The company later apologizes.
96. Still Partying Like It's 1999, Part 4: David Kim Stanley, the convicted felon who, under the name Michael Fenne, led the Web video firm Pixelon until his past crimes were discovered, manages to find backers for a new venture, which he co-founds from jail. No word yet on whether his new firm, StatGuard, will have a launch party on par with Pixelon's legendary $16 million Las Vegas blowout.
100. Houston, We Have a Problem, Part 14: In February 2002, as it struggles to emerge from bankruptcy, Enron pays more than $200,000 to retain its box seats and luxury suite at Enron Field. The company argues that it is making the payment solely to fulfill its contractual obligation -- although, coincidentally, it had earlier failed to fulfill a $200,000-a-year commitment to fund a local Boys and Girls Club.
You know that I am going to like any list that includes 15 moments from Enron. Number 96 is still my favorite DotBomb story. Pixelon is the pinnacle of stupidity in an industry full of stupid moments...mj
11:14:45 AM 
|
|
