I've been sleeping all day and now crying in the shower. She brought up a lot of thoughts and feelings, I can tell you it was never my intention to make anyone feeling uncomfortable or feel like they were being blamed for anything in my life because its my life and my feelings and my perceptions, like I'm looking in from the outside sometimes and that holiday meme, I should have never done because I was quite angry at the time.

My first thought last night was like oh shit, she read that? It was never my intention to make my mom feel bad or hurt, I was just getting my thoughts out of my head.  When did she start reading my blog anyways? I thought she hated the concept of it and the name of it.  But then again maybe I shouldn't blog about my family or the way I feel then again maybe I keep all those feelings inside and not feel them - because they aren't real but they are. I do know that it was never my intention to make my mom feel bad or that its her fault in any way that I feel that way, it isn't.  I have deleted all references to my mom on this blog or at least all references that I could find.  And I'm sorry.

This morning, I re-read what I wrote here and deleted it and part of me really wanted to move my blog to another location and denied access to any member of my family but this is my blog, damn it! plus omg, that like 6 years worth of data to move, I don't have time for that.

But one thing I can tell you is that I don't like being censored on my own blog and that I'm quite angry about being censored. And maybe that's just my perception on the whole conversation last night but these are my thoughts.  Do I need to put a disclaimer on this blog too?

Disclaimer:
If you don't like what you're reading, don't keep coming back to read it. I blog, it gets my thoughts out of my head, I do not ever intentionally blame anyone for my feelings or my perceptions of the situation.  I'm a rather shy person or maybe not shy but I don't talk about my feelings to alot of people, people see the exterior assertive me but they don't really know me and blogging is like IM, its easier to let it out via words which is probably why I like to write and with all that said, these are my thoughts and how I feel and my take on situations or things I encounter in my life.

5:29:34 PM    comment [] trackback []

1. No major project is ever installed on time, within budget or with the same staff that started it. Yours will not be the first
2. Just when you think tax season is over, think again, it has just began.
3. Projects progress quickly until they become 90% complete and then they remain at 90% complete forever
4. One advantage of fuzzy project objectives is that they let you avoid the embarrassment of estimating the corresponding costs.
5. When things are going well, something will go wrong
6. When things just cannot get any worse, they will
7. When things appear to be going better, you have overlooked something
8. If project content is allowed to change freely, the rate of change will exceed the rate of progress
9. No system is ever completely debugged. Attempts to debug a system inevitably will introduce new bugs that are even harder to find
10. A carelessly planned project will take three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project will take only twice as long
11. Project teams detest progress reporting because it vividly manifests their lack of progress.
12. When designing a program to handle all possible dumb errors, nature creates a dumber user
13. When you think you are completely prepared for life, you never are.
14. When a showing a client how something works, it will never work for you during a training session - all impossible failures will happen on the clients desktop
15. Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and twist everything you say to make you look like the idiot.
16. Never post something public that you might regret down the road
17. Life is short! Break the rules! Forgive quickly! Kiss slowly!
18. Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably
19. Dream big
20. Believe that you can do anything
21. Dance like no one is watching
22. Love yourself
23. And never regret anything that made you smile.
    

12:02:39 AM    comment [] trackback []