The Knitting Glossary we’d like to see:
What the…?
Definition: This pattern was obviously translated from the original Magyar by someone who has never held knitting needles in her life.
Swatch
Definition: What’s a swatch?
Gauge
Definition: What’s gauge?
Fudge
Definition(s): 1. To work-around indecipherable instructions
2. To bend a project to your will.
Seppucu
Definition: Japanese for “I’m going to dig out my entrails with size 3s.”
Rip out
Definition: English for “I’m going to dig out my entrails with size 3s.”
Socks
Definition: Wal-Mart, three for $5.
Crochet
Definition: How many toilet roll covers can you use in a lifetime?
Handpainted yarn
Definition: Drugs
LYS
Definition: Pushers of drugs
Fair Isle
Definition: A prescription for carpel tunnel syndrome
Intarsia
Definition: You’ve got to be kidding.
Spinning wheel
Definition: 1. Instrument with which to spin yarn.
2. A giant cat toy.
Latvian knitting
Definition: You do it.
Spouse
Definition: A handy kniddy noddy.
Toddler
Definition: A handy model for children’s sweaters.
Sheep
Definition: Important source of fiber.
Paycheck
Definition: Important source of fiber.
Credit card
Definition: Important source of fiber.
Stash
Definition: The ratio of home square footage to yarn.
Easy knitting
Definition: An oxymoron.
Hollywood knits
Definition: Yeah, in garter stitch.
Needle size (Metric, UK, American)
Definition: Who’s responsible for this?
Measurements
Definition: Pure fiction.
Finished object (FO):
Definition: Must be machine knitters.
Finishing
Definition: Hire out.
A little Friday funny for you'all.
7:51:48 AM
|