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Tuesday, May 20, 2003
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A good friend moved to Texas about six months ago and seems to be adjusting .. from one of his recent emails.
You know you?re in Texas in July when ..
- the birds use potholders to pull worms out of the ground
- the trees are whistling for the dogs
- hot water comes from both taps
- a belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron
- the temperature drops to 95 and you feel a bit chilly
- you discover that you can get sunburned through your car window
- you burn your hand opening your car
- you break into instant sweat as you step outside at 7:30am
- you realize that asphalt has a liquid state
- potatoes cook underground; just add butter, salt, and pepper
- you can make hot tea without a kettle
- farmers feed their chickens crushed ice to stop them laying boiled eggs
- cows give evaporated milk
A Texas blessing:
Bless this house, oh lord, we cry. Please keep it cool in mid-July.
Bless the walls where termites dine, while ants and roaches march in time.
Bless our yard where spiders pass the fire-ant castles in the grass.
Bless the garage, a home to please carpenter beetles, ticks and fleas.
Bless the love bugs, two by two, the gnats and mosquitoes that feed on you.
Millions of creatures that fly and crawl, in Texas, lord, you?ve put them all.
But this is home, and here we?ll stay, so thank you lord for insect spray!
6:15:02 AM 
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