Nake-id Knits

New left-slanting decrease altert: This may not be new to the knitting savants among us, but Nake-id Knits has recently learned of an elegant left-slanting decrease alternative. Here's how:

Insert your needle knitwise into the first stitch and then knitwise-through-the-back of the second stitch. Then work as a regular decrease. The resulting stitch lies flat without the extraneous bumps of an SSK. Try it, you'll like it.

Charity knits: As the holiday season approaches, our thoughts turn to knitting for others. Interweave has developed a list of knitting-related charities, Knitting for a Better World. Check it out here.

Mall rat: Was out window shopping with friends on the Boulder Mall Sunday and spied this:

The Top 12 In-Ring Putdowns
by Wrestler Bill "The Bard" Shakespeare

"Fat-kidneyed rascal, thine canker'd countenance shall kiss the cold earth anon!"

"What warrior doth tread distant battlefields unshod, his footwear relinquish'd to her whose loins begat thee?"

"But, soft! What stench through yonder buttocks breaks?"

"As thy wife for me last e'en did bend
So shall thy legs before thee at match's end!"

"Of fruitless issue is thy ill-spoken slander! For elastic is my composition, whilst thine is adhesive."

"Behind yon mask of red and gold, what coxcomb struts and frets in dainty tights, unswell'd by manly cord?"

"Thou mewling swag-bellied scullion! Thou wretched folly-fallen cutpurse! Most grievously doth thy visage offend the eye, thou droning flap-mouthed pignut!"

"Faugh! Thy putrid exhale couldst topple the carrion fowl from off his perch, atop a cart with human refuse laden."

"Get thee to a nunnery! For next to nun, methinks, is thy prospect of victory."

"Unbridled envy wouldst thine ample codpiece inspire, save that it concealeth naught but a minnow."

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's eve? For verily, thou art a douche-bag!"

and the Number 1 In-Ring Putdown by Wrestler Bill "The Bard" Shakespeare...

"Hie thee away, scoundrel, lest this metallic vessel be oped; its whoop-ass forthwith unleash'd."