THE MAN IN BLACK: AN EVEN BETTER TRIBUTE

I recently said I found a good obituary for Johnny Cash. Yes I did. That one, however, was mostly about honoring the man. Lynn, at Reflections in d minor, takes it up a level and honors how the man makes her feel.

Once again, Lynn puts into words what I would, if only I could sort out my fuzzy thoughts. That lady is a treasure.

Click on over.

DANCING FOOL

(A FILTHY LIE)

A long time ago, Frank posted a filthy lie that Evil White Glenn was a commie who does the Robot Dance.  I noticed Evil Glenn never talked about this, which made me very suspicious, so I called him about it...

Harv: So, Evil Glenn, is it true that you're a commie?

Evil Glenn: Oh yeah. Stalin's my hero. He oppressed millions of people for years. Currently I'm only oppressing about 74,488 per day, but it all adds up.

Harv: Any other heroes?

Evil Glenn: Howard Dean's ok. Even though he's only a socialist right now, I expect Presidential power would soon corrupt him into tearing up the Constitution and declaring himself absolute Commie dictator. That would be SO cool! I just hope Frank J. doesn't start punching him before that can happen.

Harv: I see. So what about the Robot Dance thing.

Evil Glenn: Not entirely true. It's really just a side effect.

Harv: Side effect?

Evil Glenn: From the spiders.

Harv: ...Spiders?

Evil Glenn: Yeah. I enjoy putting spiders in my underwear.

Harv: Geez, man. You've GOTTA stop watching Fear Factor.

Evil Glenn: You don't know what you're missing. I stuff a handful of spiders in my Jockeys and then all those tiny little legs start tickling my nether regions... WHOOO-HOOO! Stimulating!

Harv: Uh, yeah... but don't they, well, you know, bite, uh... sensitive areas?

Evil Glenn: Sure they do. And it makes my crotch swell up like a kielbasa. Afterwards, I hit the disco and do some Robot Dancing. I tell ya, the ladies just can't stop gawking at my loins.

Harv: So you're at the disco now?

Evil Glenn: Sure am! And... oh crap, they're playing Copacabana. I have to go obey my subliminal implants and blend a puppy. Oppress you later! [click]

Harv: Vile subhuman scumbag!

[RING RING]

Harv: Hello?

Evil Glenn: Lawyer. [click]

Harv: ARRRGGHHH!

So, yes, Evil Glenn is a communist, and he DOES do the Robot Dance, but only because he puts spiders in his underwear. Save the spiders!

INSTAPUNDO DELENDA EST!

IF A FIRE STARTS TO BURN, THERE'S A LESSON YOU MUST LEARN,

SOMETHING, SOMETHING, AND YOU'LL SEE,

YOU'LL AVOID CATASTROPHE!

So, over at Wizbang, Kevin has yet another craptacular edition of the Bonfire of the Vanities (#11 - will the horror NEVER end?)

Sure, the entries range from pathetic to extremely pathetic, but Kevin has some of the best intros to these monstrosities that you'll ever read. You gotta read 'em to believe 'em.

He's like Ed Sullivan, except less dead, and with all the kind thoughfulness of a French waiter.

As a side note, I think QandO should be disqualified for not sucking enough, but that's just my opinion.

(Friday, Sept. 5, "Shlock Shock" if PAB)

MISHALANCE!

The Good Emperor was kind enough to give me a double-shot of gracious linkage. He is too kind.

If for some reason you didn't come here from there, then go there, and see the glory of his wrath, as well as his... softer side.