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Sunday, February 08, 2004
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IN CONTEXT
hM of homicidalManiak has an intelligent post about the importance of not taking things out of context. She argues that, even though the left does it a lot, one should still strive, as a matter of fairness, to only address arguments as they were intended to be made, and to NOT let partisan biases interfere with your objectivity.
Ok, I'm lying. hM's post is actually about how she's REALLY hot for me
and it's undeniable proof that she wants me SO BAD. As evidence, I
offer these words, which were taken directly from her post:
you can...take...me...I'll do it for you...please...just do...that...thing.
I categorically deny that I took them out of context.
posted by Harvey at 11:56:24 PM permalink HOME
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TODAY'S LOVE NOTE
(Introduction)
All through the night I'll be standing over you.
All through the night I'll be watching over you.
And through bad dreams, I'll be right there.
Holding your hand, telling you everything is all right.
And when you cry I'll be right there telling you
You were never anything less than beautiful.
So don't you worry.
I'm your angel standing by...
posted by Harvey at 11:33:04 PM permalink HOME
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TODAY’S GRAFFITI
CURRENCY
As he boarded the plane for Honolulu, Peyton Manning patted his pockets
frantically for his lucky dollar, but soon remembered that he'd left it
on his kitchen table. "Oh well," he thought, "I'm sure I won't need it.
I've got a really good feeling about this game."
posted by Harvey at 11:27:11 PM permalink HOME
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KING OF THE BLOGS BACK IN BUSINESS
After taking a little time off for some conceptual re-tooling, the King of the Blogs Tournament has returned and this time around it's pretty darn good. I'm a little sad that Marty from Vigilance Matters wasn't around to judge this week. He has some of the best reviews. That, and he appreciates goofy humor, which some of the stuffier judges don't.
Here are my takes on the contestants' entries. The other reviews are here.
PRAGMATIC CONSERVATISM
(Submitted)
GOOD POINTS: Loved the quote from the idiot liberal professor, as well
as this zinger: "Is this rise of conservative viewpoints among youth
caused by liberal mothers aborting their children?"
BAD POINTS: This post covers 2 topics: "idiot liberals on campus" and
"the decline of liberalism as a youth trend". Mixed together as they
were, the post seemed a little jumbled. Might've been better as 2
separate, more tightly focused posts.
SCORE: 7.5
(Challenge):
GOOD POINTS: You are puny. Dan will crush you. Arnie rocks, and Dan's
in top form in this homage to one of my favorite silly violent action
flicks, Commando.
BAD POINTS: None visible
SCORE: 10
SOUTHERN MUSINGS
(Submitted)
GOOD POINTS: Female Groomsmen? Obviously a sign of the apocalypse!
However, it's still a well-constructed piece. Gives you just enough
background to understand the players and never prattles off onto an
irrelevant tangent - an easy thing to do when telling a wedding story.
BAD POINTS: My personal preference. More active verbs, fewer passive
ones. Forgo, when possible, the evil verb "be" and its dark minions.
They dull your writing.
SCORE: 8.5
(Challenge)
GOOD POINTS: In her introductory musings, she lists several strong
female movie characters worthy of emulation. In her answer, she gives
us an honest glimpse of who she is by her selection.
BAD POINTS: I think Anastasia missed the point on this question
somewhat. You could have been ANYONE, but you played it safe by
sticking with a fairly earthbound character. Next time, dream big.
SCORE: 8
CHRISTWEB
(Submitted)
GOOD POINTS: Well-written, well-argued, informative. I had no idea that the border patrol had a catch & release program
BAD POINTS: Went off on a couple tangents toward the end. The point
about needing to spend more money on renting detention cells is well
taken. The side thoughts on jobs and terrorism were off-topic, and
didn't belong in this post.
SCORE: 9
(Challenge)
GOOD POINTS: There can be only one, and Stephen makes a compelling
argument that being that immortal one would be fun, exciting, and
fulfilling.
BAD POINTS: Has the audacity to disagree with Zefram Cochrane that
immortality consists largely of boredom. However, since Stephen
wouldn't be spending his life trapped on an isolated planet with a
gaseous girlfriend, I'll give him a pass.
SCORE: 10
WHERE THE HELL WAS I?
(Submitted)
GOOD POINTS: Manages to blather on for 12 pages on the sorry premise of
being a stand-up comedian. I find myself not bored. Entertained, in
fact. Ok, amused. All right, all right, I confess. I laughed.
BAD POINTS: Yet another blogger that I'll never be funnier than. I hate these people.
SCORE: 10
(Challenge)
GOOD POINTS: Talks about naked Heather Graham
BAD POINTS: Insane stream of consciousness humor, while generally a
good thing, doesn't work here. A question needed answering, and a more
focused format was in order.
SCORE: 8
WALLOWORLD
(Submitted)
GOOD POINTS: Makes a compelling argument that iTunes 99 cents per song
pricing model is flawed, and that older, less popular songs should be
cheaper.
BAD POINTS: Must've gotten paid by the word for this piece. Could've made the point more succinctly.
SCORE: 8
(Challenge)
GOOD POINTS: Really got into the question and makes half a dozen cogent analyses of which character would be good to be.
BAD POINTS: Uh, you REALLY only needed to answer the question ONCE. I
know that sometimes you have to do some preliminary writing to get the
creative juices flowing, but once you have the gold, discard the silver
& bronze. Make the DELETE key your friend.
SCORE: 7
After everything was totaled, Where the Hell Was I?, Walloworld, and Christweb made it to the next round. Southern Musings and Pragmatic Conservatism get beaten with sticks, tossed in the dumpster, and left for dead.
We'll see how it goes next week. Should be interesting, since the top 3 scored within a 2 point range.
posted by Harvey at 11:00:06 PM permalink HOME
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TECHNOLOGY NIGHTMARE
I've owned various & sundry computers over the last 10 years, and
I'm not a technophobe by any stretch of the imagination. Many's the
time I've stuck my hands deep into the guts of my computer to replace
this, that, or the other chunk of hardware, and it usually turned out
ok in the end.
Not this time.
Beloved Wife's computer started getting extra-unstable last month, and
finally quit working entirely around Christmas. After some poking &
prodding with much assistance from Blogless Brother Tom - who is
forever performing meatball surgery on his own silicon pets, and really
knows his way around "under the hood" - we determined that the
motherboard was fried.
No problem. Just order up a new one & slap it in.
Except the one we got was a useless piece of crap.
No problem. Just order up another one & send that one back.
Except that shortly afterwards, Beloved Wife's hard drive underwent a mechanical failure and became a paperweight.
No problem. Ok, not much of a
problem. At least the motherboard is good, and we can just slap a
different hard drive into it and get her a working system to start over
on.
"Ah," said the computing gods, "a challenge"
Tom & I installed a hard drive that worked just fine in my own
computer, and was now laying around as a spare since I got a bigger
hard drive. It worked mostly fine & dandy until we tried installing
the driver for the video card, and the whole system got flaky.
Screw it. Re-format the hard drive, put on a clean copy of Win 98, and everything should be fine.
HA! Flake! Flake! Flake!
Re-format, re-install... F***!
After a total of 7 hours of this nonsense, we gave up in despair at the
insanity of it. New motherboard, new CD-ROM drive, new video card, and
no sane reason for this system to NOT purr like a kitten.
We're going to make a last ditch attempt to try a new 20G hard drive,
and after that, we're gonna take it out into a field somewhere and beat
it like the "Office Space" fax machine.
Meanwhile, I think it's time to just let Beloved Wife pick something nice off a shelf somewhere for Valentine's day.
posted by Harvey at 4:44:19 PM permalink HOME
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CHASTITY PRESERVATION
Tiffany points to the story of a 40-year-old British woman whose chastity belt set off the alarm at airport security.
Since most normal people don't wear, and have probably never seen, a
chastity belt - and those nasty people at the news didn't give pictures
- you can check out this pic of an antique chastity belt over at ErosBlog.
Nasty teeth on that baby.
As always, use discretion when visting ErosBlog, as it tends to have, shall we say, exotic imagery in the sidebars.
posted by Harvey at 1:27:14 PM permalink HOME
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© Copyright 2005 Harvey Olson.
Last update: 9/10/2005; 5:12:20 PM.
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200 WORDS OR LESS
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