Quote of the day

5:54:05 PM     

Unremembering

There was a slow unraveling of my Self beginning with the 15 minute drive to the doctor's office...my mind everywhere and nowhere simultaneously...and by the end of the worry-thread there was only a fray and I could not recall the actual drive nor anything I'd seen along the way.  I do that sometimes...drive X miles and suddenly realizing I'm where I am without remembering anything specific (for instance, actually driving).  Frightening isn't it?  But my thoughts were askew, my emotions high then low then deep, teetering on the edge of tears and fighting to keep things in perspective regarding possible outcomes of the procedure.  I was seen by the same French physician who invaded my private territory only a month ago, and received the same noncommital jargon he'd spouted before.  Results pending.  Some things look different.  Better even.  On the other hand, there are more of these and some of those we didn't see the first time.  More waiting, and oh God! how I despise waiting.  "It's probably nothing" has become my mantra, but the other wee voice in my head spurns a dread like no other <sigh>.  Scott's been so supportive, so loving and helpful - trying his best to distract me but he worries too.  Today he sent four beautiful cards to me in my email, and before I left the office I picked up one of the dried roses saved from a long-ago bouquet and spent a few moments unremembering...

5:45:51 PM     

Rumi

From my mailbox this morning...

Sublime Generosity

I was dead, then alive.
Weeping, then laughing.

The power of love came into me,
and I became fierce like a lion,
then tender like the evening star.

He said, 'You're not mad enough.
You don't belong in this house.'

I went wild and had tobe tied up.
He said, 'Still not wild enough
to stay with us!'

I broke through another layer
into joyfulness.

He said, 'Its not enough.'
I died.

He said, 'You are a clever little man,
full of fantasy and doubting.'

I plucked out my feathers and became a fool.
He said, 'Now you are the candle
for this assembly.'

But I'm no candle. Look!
I'm scattered smoke

He said, 'You are the Sheikh, the guide.'
But I'm not a teacher. I have no power.

He said, 'You already have wings.
I cannot give you wings.'

But I wanted his wings.
I felt like some flightless chicken.

Then new events said to me,
'Don't move. A sublime generosity is
coming towards you.'

And old love said, 'Stay with me.'

I said, 'I will.'

You are the fountain of the sun's light.
I am a willow shadow on the ground.
You make my raggedness silky.

The soul at dawn is like darkened water
that slowly begins to say Thank you, thank you.

Then at sunset, again, Venus gradually
Changes into the moon and then the whole nightsky.

This comes of smiling back
at your smile.

The chess master says nothing,
other than moving the silent chess piece.

That I am part of the ploys
of this game makes me
amazingly happy.

9:05:47 AM     

All fall down

Awake yet?  You will be - click here.     via...Coolstop

8:27:09 AM     

Mounted police officer and horse beaten during "peace" rally

Newsday reports that during the "peace" protest Saturday in New York City "eight officers were injured, including a mounted cop who was pulled off his horse and beaten, Kelly said. A horse also suffered injuries when a protester punched its face and pulled it to the ground by its reins, police said. Mid-afternoon Saturday, the department called for its highest level of mobilization."

"The cost of the police overtime was estimated at $5 million."

There is no excuse for this behavior.  Absolutely appalling.

8:00:29 AM     

Never too early for chicken jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road??

Ernest Hemingway's Answer:
To die. In the rain. Alone.

Rush Limbaugh's Answer:
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross

LINK....via The Presurfer

7:32:32 AM     

Ick, bleh, eh gimme coffee

Finally have working comments again thanks to Squawkbox.  I'll give it a try and see if it stays up, but I like Haloscan much better.  More template choices and easy to customize.  Squawkbox offers the same only with a "pro" account...eh.  Maybe Haloscan can get their server back up in a day or two and I can switch back later. 

Woke up very early this morning, feeling anxious and jittery.  I have a second ultrasound test to endure in a few hours to see if the cyst is still there, and will have to make another doctor's appointment for followup in a few days.  bleh.

The scene from my window is dreary with smoke-thick gray clouds hovering low like a fog, and naked tree branches eerily surrounding all points of view.  But the coffee is strong and fresh, and Sugar is sitting on the window sill behind me, her soft kitten ears alert for any movement of birds flapping by and squirrels scampering tree trunks.  She's great company in the early morning hours and will soon find her way into my lap for a snuggle.  I'm going in to work late today.  After the test.  ick.

7:00:26 AM